Talk:Sunda Straits Crisis

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Sunda Straits Crisis/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

I'll take this one. Reviewer: Chiswick Chap (talk · contribs) 18:32, 3 April 2017 (UTC)

Comments

I'll say at once that this is an impressively well-written article (with a particularly clear summary in the lead), and few signs of anything that needs fixing, so I expect my comments will be few and simple. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:32, 3 April 2017 (UTC)

• I'd suggest additional wikilinks in image captions: Sunda Strait (also in lead), Java, Sumatra, President Sukarno, Konfrontasi (also in text), HMS Victorious, Subandrio.
  • Done.
• A few terms could usefully be wikilinked in the main text, e.g. Lombok Strait.
  • Done (Imperialist, Carrier Group, etc).
• A few glosses would be welcome, e.g. Lord Antony Head is introduced without explanation, and we're not told what role R.A. Butler had at that moment.
  • I've added the roles of both.
• When did Ramsay Macdonald call the project the 'Grand Design', and was it when he was PM?
  • My sincere apologies, it was supposed to be Malcolm McDonald. Anyhow, it was at some point during the 1950s.

Aha.

• Who was the Tunku of Malaysia at the time? It might also be worth glossing the term, say as "(prince)".
  • It was Abdul Rahman, in fact, the Prime Minister to whom my source seems to refer to. I've changed this in the text.
• I'm unsure about the use of "Confrontation" with a capital. If as it seems it's a translation of Konfrontasi then the latter would seem to be the better, more specific term?
  • Most of the sources I have read, including primary-source British ones, talk about the Confrontation like such, and seem to use it interchangeably with the policy and also with the conflict. I would prefer to leave it, but I will change it if you feel it is necessary.

OK.

• "too powerful an asset to lose" -> "too valuable an asset to lose".
  • Done.
• "in retaliation to" -> "in retaliation for"
  • Done.
• "equally if not more valid than" doesn't quite work, we can't say "equally valid than". Suggest "equally as valid, if not more than".
  • Done.
• "the subsequent Indonesian United Nations defeat" should either be wikilinked or briefly explained and dated.
  • I was actually referring the near-condemnation of Indonesia in the UN, mentioned in the 1st paragraph of 'Aftermath.'
• "the closest point to which the Indonesia-Malaysia confrontation came to total war" -> "the closest the Indonesia-Malaysia confrontation came to total war".
  • Done.

Images

• The Peter Thorneycroft image is non-free. I rather doubt that's ok here, but if you wish to try your luck you at least need an NFUR under the image on Commons: otherwise, please remove the image.
  • I have removed the image, after finding no adequate substitute. Anyway, thank you for your thoughtful review, your help is much appreciated. Regards, Herodotus (talk) 00:43, 4 April 2017 (UTC)

Many thanks. Chiswick Chap (talk) 07:30, 4 April 2017 (UTC)

Summary

This is an elegantly-constructed article well up to the required standard and I'm happy to pass it as a GA. I wish you the best of luck with it at FAC if that's where you're headed. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:27, 4 April 2017 (UTC)