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Wikipedia:Peer review/1867 Manhattan, Kansas earthquake/archive1

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I've listed this article for peer review because I'd like to bring it to FAC eventually. I think the prose needs some fine-tuning, and I want to ensure that it's fully comprehensive.

Thanks, ceranthor 21:41, 20 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Eddie891

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Comments are coming soon. Don't be disheartened. Ping me if I forget to comment in the next few days.Eddie891 Talk Work 16:45, 21 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

@Eddie891: Any and all comments are greatly appreciated! ceranthor 15:27, 23 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
"It caused largely minor damage, reports of which were confined to Kansas, Iowa, and Missouri, according to the United States Geological Survey." Perhaps mention if there were any instances of major damage? I'd find the article to be better if there is more detail on damages in the lead. Unless, of course, the damage was only minor, in which case I'd scrap the "largely".
  • "it hosts the Humboldt Fault Zone" Perhaps consider linking instead "it hosts the Humboldt Fault Zone."
  • "A normal fault, or dip-slip fault" Personally I'd change to "A normal, or dip-slip fault" to avoid repetition of fault.
  • "Despite the fact that it was previously thought to be a simple, Precambrian structure, according to the Geological Society of America, it may actually be a complex fault." I'd rephrase to "Despite being previously thought to be a simple, Precambrian structure, according to the Geological Society of America, it may be a complex fault."
  • "According to United States Geological Survey geophysicist Don Steeples, earthquakes at the Humboldt Zone have decreased and activity at the Uplift has increased." Are we talking decreases in months, years, decades, centuries, millennia &c? Some context may be apt.
Changed to "as of the 1980s". ceranthor 19:00, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The 1867 Manhattan earthquake remains the largest earthquake" Largest based on land covered? Perhaps clarify.
The source just says "largest earthquake". See [1]. ceranthor 19:00, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "though at least 25 in total have taken place since" perhaps clarify to "though at least 25 have taken place since" because in total is basically unnecessary.
  • "According to a report in the Bulletin of the Seismological Society of America, the frequency between earthquakes is between 40 and 45 years." 1) are we talking in just manhattan, or all of Kansas, and 2) perhaps rephrase as "According to a report in the Bulletin of the Seismological Society of America, an earthquake occurs in [Manhattan or Kansas] between every 40 and 45 years."
  • "where the cupola (a relatively small, most often dome-like, tall structure)" Do you need to describe a cupola? It is linked, and I feel a fair amount of people know what a cupola is
I didn't know what it was, so I think it's fair to keep it! :) ceranthor 19:00, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "shook violently and was stopped and evacuated " the two ands sound odd. Perhaps rephrase as "shook violently, was stopped and evacuated "
  • "In Topeka, Kansas state's capital city, the" Perhaps rephrase as "In Topeka, the capital of Kansas, the"
  • "One study found that between December 1977 and June 1989, more than 100 earthquakes were recognized by a seismograph network." So an earthquake over 100 years ago led to that study? Seems doubtful.
Agreed. I think I wrote the original part about the inspiration for these studies a while back, but I'll move this info to another relevant section, since I still think it's useful. ceranthor 19:00, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Overall, a good article. Eddie891 Talk Work 00:05, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
@Eddie891: Thanks! I replied to some and fixed the rest. ceranthor 19:00, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
That's all from me. Please ping me if you FA nominate. If you have a moment, would you mind looking at my Peer Review? If not, that is perfectly fine. Eddie891 Talk Work 01:21, 26 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from FrB.TG

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  • "The earthquake reached Indiana and Illinois, and perhaps Ohio" - perhaps link these states since they are not very well-known as opposed to some other US states?
  • Too many though's from the lead to background and geography.
  • "The Chicago Tribune observed in its article "At Leavenworth, Kansas" that the earthquake was completely unexpected, describing the event as "[...] sudden in its coming and departure." It confirms that earthquakes were not common in earlier time and states that "all were more or less startled, and, indeed, frightened."" Not sure about the use of different tenses for the article.
  • "All were between 4 and .8" - is the full stop in ".8" intended?
  • "If an earthquake were to occur here" - I find there better. FrB.TG (talk) 21:32, 22 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
@FrB.TG: Should all be addressed. Yes, the .8 is intended. ceranthor 15:23, 23 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Pseud14

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Here are my initial comments starting with the lead.

  • "The 1867 Manhattan earthquake struck Riley County, Kansas on April 24 at 14:22 local time." - maybe begin the lead with "The Manhattan earthquake struck Riley County, Kansas" and plug in as m-d-y and time.
I think I appreciate it more the way it is, since it matches other earthquake FAs like 1968 Illinois earthquake and 2005 Qeshm earthquake, for example.
  • "The earthquake had intensities up to VII (Very strong) on the Mercalli intensity scale" - "registered an intensity of VII or Very Strong" or "had a maximum perceived intensity of"
  • "The earthquake reached Indiana and Illinois, and perhaps Ohio, though the latter reports have been questioned". - perhaps take out this last sentence and plug it in after "felt over an area of roughly 193,051 square miles (500,000 km2), including Indiana and Illinois..." (unless my US geography is wrong, you can ignore this)
Changed to "Felt over an area of 193,051 square miles (500,000 km2), the earthquake reached the states of Indiana and Illinois, and perhaps Ohio, though the latter reports have been questioned."

Will get to the rest of the sections, next. Pseud 14 (talk) 13:54, 23 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks. These should be addressed. ceranthor 15:26, 23 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Ceranthor, Here are the rest of my comments:
  • Manhattan lies near the Nemaha Ridge anticline (a type of geological fold with an arch-like shape), which likely produced the earthquake.[3] A 300‑million-year-old Precambrian granite range bounded by faults, it hosts the Humboldt Fault Zone, which, in addition to serving as the range's easternmost boundary, has produced a large portion of the state's earthquakes.[2] - Perhaps reword/restructure this. Since anticline is piped, maybe remove the enclosure. I think this could be phrased as: Manhattan lies near the Nemaha Ridge anticline, a 300‑million-year-old Precambrian granite range bounded by faults, which likely produced the earthquake. It hosts the Humboldt Fault Zone, which, in addition to serving as the range's easternmost boundary, has produced a large portion of the state's earthquakes.
  • then stops abruptly. - perhaps use 'terminate' instead of stop (geographically speaking). "where it terminates abruptly" or "where the rift terminates"
  • Originating at 20:22 UTC, or around 2:30 local time - may use military time since the format was used in the lead, for consistency.
  • The city of Atchison saw two shocks - perhaps use "felt two shocks"
  • which caused fallen lamps, fallen bottles - "fallen lamps and bottles" instead since you have the two fallen.
  • houses shake and tableware shake - same as above "house and tableware"
  • with severe shaking - perhaps use 'tremors' since shake/shook is used predominantly
  • Under "Future Threats" section, there are two instances where "If an earthquake were to occur, it would likely" is used in consecutive sentences. Maybe rephrase the other.
  • "determining a 1 percent" - perhaps use the symbol 1% -- Pseud 14 (talk) 12:06, 30 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
@Pseud 14: Think I've fixed all of these. Thanks! ceranthor 16:20, 30 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]