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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Gog the Mild via FACBot (talk) 21 July 2023 [1].

Taxi Driver (Alexander McQueen collection)

[edit]
Nominator(s): ♠PMC♠ (talk) 00:17, 1 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

There once was a man named McQueen,
whose fashion was nearly obscene
Hid the clothes in some junk
while he went and got drunk
Lost it all to the trash man's routine

♠PMC♠ (talk) 00:17, 1 July 2023 (UTC)

CommentsSupport by Chris

[edit]
  • Just a couple of UK English tweaks from me....
  • "believed it was named to honor...." => "believed it was named to honour...."
  • "recalling that the collection was named for the film" => "recalling that the collection was named after the film"
  • That's it! Another excellent McQueen article -- ChrisTheDude (talk) 16:55, 1 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Aoba47

[edit]
  • In the lead and the body of the article, the "the" in the Ritz should not capitalized.
  • Tweaked
  • Added
  • For "a pattern cutter", I think it may be helpful to add a link for pattern for readers who may be unfamiliar with the concept.
  • Done
  • Is there a way to link "masters-level course" to help non-U.K. readers?
  • I don't think we have an article about British masters degrees, so I've linked Master's degree
  • If read literally, this part, (Concerned about the difficulty involved in launching a brand-new business, McQueen's preference), reads that his preference was the one concerned. I would instead use something like (McQueen preferred to land a job...).
  • Untangled
  • For this part, (McQueen used liquid latex), is there a reason why liquid latex is not linked directly instead?
  • Different product - liquid latex the article refers to a specific latex compound used in special effects, but this is more like cheap industrial latex in liquid form.
  • I have a question about this sentence: (The collar alone apparently took two weeks of work.) I found the "apparently" word choice a bit odd. I looked at the source and found that it presents this timing as more of a fact. Is there any reason why "apparently" was added? It just makes the timing seem more uncertain than the source lets on.
  • That's fair, I removed it
  • I have a question about how items are linked in the citations. Citation 3 does not have The Daily Telegraph linked, Citation 4 does not have GQ linked, and Citation 5 does not have The Independent linked. I know that different editors link items differently in citations (whether only on their first use or in each citation), but I would think that these items should at least be linked on the first use.
  • Not intentional, just oversight. All sites should now be all linked in all citations.
  • Fixed

I hope these comments are helpful. Once everything has been addressed, I will read through the article a few more times just to make sure I have not missed anything. Best of luck with the FAC! Aoba47 (talk) 18:58, 1 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Hello Aoba, always lovely to see you at my FACs :D Everything above has been fixed (I hope). Cheers! ♠PMC♠ (talk) 22:31, 1 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]
I am glad that I could help. I always enjoy reading your work on here and I found this article to be very engaging and interesting. I will read through the article again tomorrow. Aoba47 (talk) 01:09, 2 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]
I have read through the article again, and everything looks solid to me. I support this FAC for promotion based on the prose. Aoba47 (talk) 11:00, 2 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Source review by Vat

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I reviewed this article at GAN, and I see it's already getting plenty of prose attention, so I'll focus on a source review instead.

  • Personal preference, but: ref order at In an effort to promote McQueen's work to buyers, they held showings of Taxi Driver at their agency in Covent Garden in late February 1993.[b][27][16][25] is disordered.
  • Fixed
  • Sources all have reliable publishers, seem to be within normal variance of opinions on the subject, and are archived where required.
  • Formatting is acceptable until we repeal citevar
  • you'll never defeat the efficient power of sfn, villain
  • Article links for notable writers all seem to go to the right place, and none of them say anything like "wrote a hitpiece about Alexander McQueen after trying to murder him" or something.
  • In-depth spotchecks not required, but I checked a couple out of curiosity and saw nothing amiss.

Source review is a pass. As a general note, I'd recommend doing something with the monetary figures -- there are two different currencies used in the article, so converting between them would be worthwhile, and it'd also be nice to have inflation-adjusted amounts. (Per GAN, a clarification that the intended price of the jacket was £800 is still probably reasonable to avoid the whiplash of nothing actually having actionable prices.) Vaticidalprophet 16:03, 2 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

  • Thanks for taking care of the source review, Vati! I feel like including both GBP-US and 1994-present conversions would be really cluttered and confusing, so I'd prefer not to. Also, I still don't get what you mean when you say nothing had actionable prices. The items were for sale to retail buyers, that was the whole point of the exhibition. ♠PMC♠ (talk) 05:28, 3 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

PCN02WPS

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  • "by British designer Alexander McQueen" → recommend changing to "The British fashion designer..." to avoid a false title
  • Same false title issue as above is present to begin the body
  • I prefer the less cluttered version without the "the" and I don't see anything in MOS that prohibits it. It also has not been an issue at previous FACs.
  • "sometimes controversial designs, and dramatic fashion shows" → I think the comma should be after "controversial" since "and dramatic fashion shows" doesn't need a comma before it on its own
  • Hm, ok
  • "Journalist Dana Thomas describes the exhibition" → this present-tense sounds a bit odd in a paragraph of all past tense
  • Tweaked
  • "had come by and removed everything" → "come by" seems redundant to me; I think this would be better as "had removed everything"
  • Yeah, removed
  • This may seem silly but I think a link to nightclub would be helpful upon the first reference of "clubbing" or a "club" since some readers might not know what that's referring to
  • Reworded to accomodate this

That's all I got on my first readthrough, not much to complain about at all. PCN02WPS (talk | contribs) 16:23, 2 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

SC

[edit]
Background
  • “London's notoriously poor East End” Not sure about the description here. Having lived in East London over 30 years ago, I can assure you that while there are some parts that are poor, there are other bits that are quite well-to-do (and “notorious” is even more of a stretch!)
  • Yeah, on review of the source I did go a bit off-label there. I've tweaked it
Creation of label
  • “nothing panned out” is a bit slangy: “but nothing came of them” would be a bit more formal
  • Yup, fixed
Sales efforts
  • “coat-check fees”: it’s a cloakroom in English
  • Fixed
Reception
  • The'd
  • “unequivocably” is normally spelled “unequivocally”: which way does the quote put it?
  • Double checked and it is indeed "unequivocably"

That’s it: scant fare from another excellent article in the series. - SchroCat (talk) 22:11, 10 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from HAL

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  • went clubbing -- is there a more encyclopedic way to word this?
  • wikt:clubbing is the usual noun to describe going out and engaging in various nightclub activities. Both Webster's and OED define it this way.
  • sharp tailoring that would become a McQueen signature --> "sharp tailoring that became a McQueen signature" per WP:WOULDCHUCK
  • Revised
  • Ditto both would be recurring elements in McQueen's designs
  • Also revised
  • sometimes controversial, -- subjective, but I don't think that comma is needed. Feel free to disregard.
  • I tried it without but I think it reads better with
  • brand-new - should that be hyphenated? Also, why not just say "new"?
  • Trimmed
  • Ditto brand-new silhouette, and what is a silhouette?
  • I changed it to "completely new"; it really should be emphasized what an unusual thing it was to do at his age and experience level. In fashion, the silhouette is the outline of a garment on its wearer. Think an A-line dress, or bell bottoms. We don't have an article on the concept because our coverage of fashion is monstrously bad, although I've just added it to wiktionary.
  • a slumping economy -- would 'the' be more appropriate?
  • Sure
  • With When he returned the next day, the entire collection was gone., the lead makes it sound as if it was stolen rather than taken by garbage collectors.
  • Revised the lead
  • What are couture pieces? Could you link it?
  • I had this whole explanation of couture typed up and then I looked at the source again and just reworded it.

That's all. Nice work. ~ HAL333 14:32, 11 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Image review—pass

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That should complete image review. Pseud 14 (talk) 14:36, 16 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Support

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I focused on the prose while reading the article and everything seems good to go. Really enjoying this series!--NØ 04:57, 19 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Drive-by comments

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  • In the bibliography, Frankel seems to be out of alphabetical order.
  • Is there a publisher location for Thomas?

Gog the Mild (talk) 14:15, 20 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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