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Talk:Robert Hughes (Royal Navy officer, died 1729)/GA1

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Reviewer: Zawed (talk · contribs) 22:51, 1 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Pulling up my seat for this one, comments to follow in due course. Zawed (talk) 22:51, 1 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Zawed: No rush here, just pinging in case this has slipped past you. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 12:37, 9 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Into this now:

  • Infobox: should England not be added to places of death and burial?
  • Done.
  • Hughes also joined the navy, and with the Nine Years' War ongoing was...: I think comma misplaced here, should it be: "Hughes also joined the navy and, with the Nine Years' War ongoing, was..."?
  • Done.
  • Is there a link for "second lieutenant" like there is for "first lieutenant"
  • Not that I'm aware. There should be!
  • Hughes was at an undefined point after this promoted to commander, before on 28 June 1697 he was advanced to captain.: this may be a consequence trying avoid hewing too closely to the source, but not crazy about the phrasing. Assuming it is sufficiently far away from the source, how about: "Sometime after this, Hughes was promoted to commander before, on 28 June 1697, being advanced in rank to captain."?
  • Done.
  • At the same time as his promotion...": because preceding sentence refers to two promotions, suggest "At the same time as his promotion to captain"
  • Done.
  • In the following year...: suggest "The following year..." because the "In" doesn't seem to work/flow for me. Note that there are two instances of this usage in the article
  • Changed.
  • ...also serving in the Channel, the flagship of Rear-Admiral Sir Thomas Hardy.: suggest "also serving in the Channel, but as the flagship of Rear-Admiral Sir Thomas Hardy."
  • Rejigged.
  • Add HMS Hampton Court to list of ships commanded in infobox
  • Done, good catch.
  • Unfortunately a bit light on detail at times, which I take is a reflection of the sources. Is there nothing to indicate his age at the time of death? Is there a photo of his momument; I found an image of James Sayer's monument which gave an age, perhaps the one for Hughes does as well?
  • Not that I could find.
  • Sources a mixture of very old and recent, but look to be published by reputable publishers. I would have been concerned about the Charnock ref if not for the republication by Cambridge University Press.
  • Image tag OK
  • No dupe links

That's it for me. Zawed (talk) 03:55, 14 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Zawed: Hi, thanks for taking a look at this! My responses are above. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 12:34, 15 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Looks fine, passing as GA now. Cheers, Zawed (talk) 10:27, 16 July 2023 (UTC)[reply]
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