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GA Review

[edit]

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer:NiciVampireHeart10:10, 12 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Quck fail criteria
  1. Has reliable sources
  2. Is written neutrally
  3. No valid cleanup tags
  4. Is relatively stable with no edit wars
  5. Not specifically concerned with a rapidly unfolding current event with a definite endpoint
Full review
GA review (see here for criteria)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:

1a: prose

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Lead
  • "He joined Scarborough on work experience" - on "work experience"?
    • Yes, work experience. It counts as work experience rather than a loan because Foster was part of Sheffield Wednesday's Academy. When on work experience, players can't appear for the first team of another Football League side but they can play for the first team of a non-league side; in this instance, Scarborough. SBFCEdit (talk)
  • "On return" - should either be "On his return" or "On returning".
Early career
  • Again "on work experience" is strange. I don't think I've come across this in any other footballing article, and I'm not quite sure what it's supposed to mean. Was he sent out on loan to get more experience?
  • "On return" --> "On his return"
  • "Foster made his debut for Lincoln in the club's first game of the season, a 2–1 defeat to Notts County, but failed to hold down a first-team place and had to wait a month to make another appearance for the club – coming on as a 73rd minute substitute in Lincoln's 2–0 win against Stockport County." Very long sentence. Recommend splitting it into two.
  • "Foster was rewarded with an extended one-year contract". Rewarded is a stange verb to use.
    • Not sure I agree that it's a strange verb to use. But changed. SBFCEdit (talk)
  • "This loan deal was extended for another month, but was curtailed due to injury, making his last appearance for York in the club's 1–0 loss to Bristol City in the FA Cup." Recommend splitting this into two sentences. And whose injury? His? Or was he recalled to Lincoln dueto injuries in the Lincoln team?
  • "Foster returned to Lincoln in December, and a month later was told by the club that he was free to find another club after being deemed surplus to requirements at Sincil Bank, and in January 2007, he mutually agreed to cancel his contract with Lincoln, enabling him to join Conference North side Stalybridge Celtic." Again, would recommend splitting this into two sentences.
  • Link for "FA Trophy"?
  • Link for "own-goal"?
Oxford United
  • "He made his Oxford debut two weeks after signing for the club, starting in a 1–0 home defeat to Kidderminster Harriers, and played a total of nine games during the club's 2006–07 campaign, scoring once in a 2–0 win over St Albans City at Clarence Park." Run-on sentence. Split into two.
  • "He finished the 2007–08 season by winning Oxford's Supporters Player of the Year and Players' Player of the Year awards,[37] during which he made 37 appearances." --> "At the end of the 2007–08 season, during which he made 37 appearances, he won Oxford's Supporters Player of the Year and Players' Player of the Year awards."
  • Link for "penalty".
Mansfield Town
  • "instantly appointed as club captain." --> "instantly appointed the club captain."

2b: reliable sources

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  • Is findmypast.com (reference 1) reliable?
    • Findmypast is very reliable. Its database has exactly the same information as the likes of Hugman, the difference is you can actually reference it online. SBFCEdit (talk)
  • Not sure about the reliability of statto.com (references 45 and 46). I'd recommend replacing it.

3a: broad?

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There's no personal life information in the article, except that he was born in Mexborough, South Yorkshire. Is there any other information available? For example:

  1. Early life, including siblings, school, college. Did he have any heroes/idols growing up?
  2. Any mention of his lovelife? Wife, etc?
  3. Other endeavours, like a different job, charity campaigns, etc?
  • I'll look into it. If all else fails, I'll bolster the article with a "style of play" section. SBFCEdit (talk)

Overall

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  • I am placing this article on hold for seven days to allow you to fix the problems listed. If the work is completed before then, I will pass the article before the seven days are up. If no attempts are made to correct the problems, I will fail the article in seven days. If you are not finished within the seven days, I have no problem in extending the hold period to allow you to finish, as long as I see work is being carried out on the article.
  • To make it easier for me to see how much work has been done, please either strike each comment when the problem has been fixed or post a note underneath each item saying it is completed.
  • Feel free request to clarification on anything; you can leave comments on my talk page or here, as I have this page watchlisted.
NiciVampireHeart10:10, 12 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks for taking the time out to review the article. I've made all the changes, I just need to look into Foster's personal life, hopefully there's something somewhere. I'll let you know on this page when I've looked into it. Thanks. SBFCEdit (talk) 03:27, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Have just added a bit on his personal life. Let me know if there's anything else. Thanks. SBFCEdit (talk) 05:21, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Further

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  • Personal life section looks good. Very nice find with that interview.
  • Regarding the work experience, ok, makes sense. A link in the article would be great if possible. I've no idea to where you'd link it though.
  • I'm not entirely convinced by findmypast.co.uk. I would prefer it be replaced, or supplemented by an additional source. I'm probably being overly cautious, but it is sourcing the full name of a BLP. If you retain the source, I'd suggest fixing the url as well, as the current url only allows searches for deaths and marriages. [1]
NiciVampireHeart13:01, 14 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Changed reference, referenced Rollin's Sky Sports text. SBFCEdit (talk) 00:50, 15 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Excellent. ♥NiciVampireHeart12:43, 16 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Pass

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NiciVampireHeart12:43, 16 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]