Talk:Islais Creek
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GA Review
[edit]- This review is transcluded from Talk:Islais Creek/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
I will be reviewing this article for GA. Give me a little time to read it and give you feedback. On the whole, it looks like a good article but I will give you a list of things that need fixing. Feel free to ask me questions. —Mattisse (Talk) 19:06, 23 August 2008 (UTC)
- Here's one....There should be little or no citations in the lead...the info should be repeated later in the article with citations there...see WP:LEAD. the_ed17 19:11, 23 August 2008 (UTC)
- (ec) Here is my list of comments.
- The lead needs to be longer per WP:LEAD and be a concise summary of the major sections of the article.
- You do not need reference citations in the lead, as the material will be referenced in the main body of the article where you discuss the material in the lead.
- There are places where you have too many citations, especially when they are the same citation For example:
Since Islais Creek is a culvert that carries storm water, domestic sewage, and industrial wastewater all together, it is possible for the sewage to overflow. Such overflow can cause a public health hazard[1] as Islais Creek displays higher level of heavy metals[1], PCBs[1], bacteria[1], as well as organochlorines than other parts of the San Francisco Bay.[2]
- ^ a b c d Randall Frost (2005-03-26). "Storm Runoffs May Pose Health, Environmental Risks". Neighborhood Newswire. Retrieved 2008-08-21.
- ^ Kennish, Michael (1991-11-19). Ecology of Estuaries: Anthropogenic Effects. CRC Press. p. 512. ISBN 0849380413.
- The massive paragraphs need to be broken down into smaller ones for readability and variety.
Otherwise, it looks very good. I may offer more suggestions later. And I am willing to help you out and do some of the work. —Mattisse (Talk) 19:18, 23 August 2008 (UTC)
- I fix most of your concerns except for the first. I am not sure what can I add to the lead since this is a short article.—Chris! ct 20:35, 23 August 2008 (UTC)
- Maybe you could give some brief tidbits from course and history - like its watershed has been reduced by 80% and at one time the city considered filling it in, that today there are concerted efforts to improve it -- just suggestions. —Mattisse (Talk) 21:01, 23 August 2008 (UTC)
- I will try to address this asap. Thanks —Chris! ct 22:11, 23 August 2008 (UTC)
- Maybe you could give some brief tidbits from course and history - like its watershed has been reduced by 80% and at one time the city considered filling it in, that today there are concerted efforts to improve it -- just suggestions. —Mattisse (Talk) 21:01, 23 August 2008 (UTC)
- This article is really very good. References, prose etc. look great. A good job. —Mattisse (Talk) 21:38, 23 August 2008 (UTC)
- I expand the lead. What do you think?—Chris! ct 00:37, 24 August 2008 (UTC)
- It is fine. Just a few more details:
- Question: "...and near Third Street where the creek emptied in the San Francisco Bay." Does it still empty into the bay today?
- "...community groups in the Bayview". What is the Bayview?
- It is the name of the neighborhood. I add a wikilink to clarify it.—Chris! ct 18:47, 24 August 2008 (UTC)
- You do not have an access date for reference 6. I realize it is the same as one of the above, but there it is called by a different name.
- Reference 6 is a note so it doesn't need access date.—Chris! ct 19:42, 24 August 2008 (UTC)
- O.K. I'll take your word for it.
Indian villages?
[edit]I am concerned that the claim of villages in the vicinity of this creek might be unfounded. SaltyBoatr get wet 14:48, 9 August 2011 (UTC)
External links modified
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