Talk:1948 Bermuda–Newfoundland hurricane

1948 Bermuda–Newfoundland hurricane has been listed as one of the Natural sciences good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it.
Review: October 15, 2013. (Reviewed version).

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GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:1948 Bermuda–Newfoundland hurricane/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Yellow Evan (talk · contribs) 12:33, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

" The storm was the eighth named storm and third hurricane of the annual hurricane season, the cyclone originated off the coast of Africa from a tropical wave on September 4, and tracked a general westward path for much of its initial stages as it gradually intensified, reaching tropical storm intensity shortly after development and then hurricane intensity a day later." this sentence just does not seem right. I call for it to be divided into two separate sentences. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 12:33, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Done – I feel like this wasn't intentional; nonetheless I divided the specified passage and changed the wording such that the flow would be better. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 19:03, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"a parabolic track," I'd link that. The average American doesn't feel like remembering Algebra 1 :P Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane

Done – 'parabolic track' was linked to parabola. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 19:03, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"the resulting remnants persisted for an additional day." no need for resulting. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 12:33, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Done – 'Resulting' was deleted and 'the' was replaced with 'these'. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 19:03, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Why are power lines linked? Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 12:33, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Done – Power lines was delinked. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 19:03, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"Beginning on September 15, the hurricane tracked east of Newfoundland, bringing with it heavy rain." try to re-write the last part of the sentence. It does not really imply that rain fell over Newfoundland, it hints that it fell east of Newfoundland. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 12:33, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Done – Replaced with 'producing heavy rainfall across the Canadian province'. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 19:03, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"Overall, the tropical cyclone caused eight fatalities." say "the hurricane" here, you used "the tropical cyclone" a bit earlier. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 12:33, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Done – Reworded and replaced with suggested wording. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 19:03, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"a modern-day Category 2 hurricane at 0600 UTC on September 8.[3]" on what scale? BOM? SSHWS? Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 12:33, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Done – Specified SSHWS.

"no fatalities were reported." try to not to mention stuff like this. We might as well add in the TAM did not turn into a monkey as a result of this hurricane :P Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 12:33, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Done – Removed information.

"With winds equivalent to that of a Category 1 hurricane, the cyclone brushed east of the island, bringing strong winds and extensive flooding." you mention it brought winds twice in the same sentence, I proposal that you eliminate one of the two instances. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 12:33, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Done – 'You proposal' is grammatically incorrect. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 19:03, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Add a note on how all damage totals are of 1948. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 12:33, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Done – Such a note was added. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 19:03, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Otherwise, life is good. Not too much bloat here TAM. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 12:33, 14 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]