Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/Peer review/Hans Beißwenger
I have worked on another Luftwaffe fighter pilot article that I would like reviewed. Again I need to point out that I have nothing on his personal life, sorry for that. You may also have a look at the class rating (start right now) and check if it meets B-class. MisterBee1966 (talk) 07:27, 3 January 2010 (UTC)
Auntieruth55
[edit]Again, a nicely done article. Not much to go on without anything his personal life. :(
- He had achieved his 50th aerial victory was achieved the previous day on 8 May. This sentence is confusing. ? He scored his 50th aerial victory on 8 May?
- jump from where he was born to he transferred to....which is a bit of a jump.
- Is it possible to work the promotion request text into your article? This offers an interesting view of his character, and the promotion requirements as well, and might enhance your description of him, which at present is pretty much he shot down this plane on that day, he transferred, he shot down two more planes, he did something else, etc. Just cogitating....Auntieruth55 (talk) 18:44, 12 January 2010 (UTC)
Marine79
[edit]I like the article. There are a few things I noticed and one thing I fixed.
- Fixed-- I moved the (First Lieutenant)(Second Lieutenant) behind the first references to Oberleutnant and Leutnant so the translation can be made the first time that rank is used in the article instead of in the middle in a quote.
- Noticed.1-- In the section of his military career the dates get a little out of sequence. 15 Aug he gets kill 75, 26 Sep he gets 100, 30 Sep he recieves an award, then back in time to 4 Sep is the promotion quote.
- .2-- I think re-organizing his career into years might straighten out some of the paragraphs.
- .3-- Maybe there could be a table of his victories milestones at the end of is military career section.