User talk:Jroberson4
| This user is a student editor in University_of_Central_Arkansas/Advanced_Evolution_(Spring_2019) . |
Welcome!
[edit]Hello, Jroberson4, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Elysia and I work with the Wiki Education Foundation; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.
I hope you enjoy editing here. If you haven't already done so, please check out the student training library, which introduces you to editing and Wikipedia's core principles. You may also want to check out the Teahouse, a community of Wikipedia editors dedicated to helping new users. Below are some resources to help you get started editing.
Handouts
|
|---|
Additional Resources
|
|
If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Elysia (Wiki Ed) (talk) 20:57, 14 January 2019 (UTC)
Peer Review - Mosbey
[edit]Julia,
Great job on covering a very broad topic. I understand how difficult condensing a topic that can easily encompass an entire semesters worth of classes into a single article. I suggested a few grammatical comments that will help the overall flow of your article. The one thing I would strongly recommend you look into is adding more citations. There were a few times when you made specific statements that I felt should have a citation included with them to give more credibility to the statements. The only reason I suggest this is because a reader who does not have the background information that you do would want to know how you got the information you stated. Second, in the evolution of dog breeds section, reading through some sentences felt a little repetitive, specifically in word choice and structure. I would review that section and see if there is a way you can edit a few sentences. Other than that, great job. I love learning about the history of different dog breeds so I enjoyed reading your article.
Just an fyi, did you know that Great Danes were originally bred to kill hogs? Their large jaws allow them to latch onto a hogs throat and kill with ease. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Jmosbey17 (talk • contribs) 17:43, 30 March 2019 (UTC)
Peer Review - Steven Lemp
[edit]Good article, Julia! Most of my comments were grammatical changes. My biggest suggestion was that you break up the "Evolution of Dog Breeds" section with subheadings somehow - it's a very big block of text at the moment. It might be too much if you broke it down by each breed you describe, but at the very least that would increase readability. Also with your last "DNA testing" section, I would either give a less detailed overview of the process and focus on why it's done, or get really specific with the process. Right now, something like the sentence about keeping the genetic material at a desired temperature reads a little weird because it doesn't commit either way. Again, great job! - Steven Lemp — Preceding unsigned comment added by BatmanWallet123 (talk • contribs) 11:19, 31 March 2019 (UTC)
Peer review - Grant
[edit]I found the subject of your article very interesting in that I have never researched the aspects of the evolution of dog breeds and how diverse it is. The major changes I found necessary for your paper were formatting and sentence revision to improve the overall flow. The information was sound and I felt you accomplished the objective of educating those without prior knowledge of how the domesticated dog has evolved over the years. One comment I left at the end of the first paragraph was to possibly elaborate more into how selective breeding by humans has led to this directional expansion and evolution of various breeds. This will flow and provide a better transition when you go into detail about this later. Overall I enjoyed the article and found it to be an interesting read.
Peer review review
[edit]Hi Julia! You've done a nice job with a cool topic. Your reviewers have left you some great suggestions (and I put some specific comments in there as well). Go ahead and look through and start responding. I think the most important thing is to make sure you have proper citations in the final version of this article that goes "live". You may have to rework the Evolution of Breeds section to include only those things you have been able to find stated directly in papers. A lot of your cited papers talk about genetics, but you don't mention that in this section, so I would add that in (since you are citing those papers already). I agree with your reviewers that that section should be broken up. Maybe by breeds? But maybe something else makes more sense. You don't have to talk about all the breeds, maybe just those that are good examples where you have good sources. With these edits I think this will be a really great article! Advevol (talk) 22:56, 31 March 2019 (UTC)
Edits
[edit]All of the suggestions given to me were very helpful and I am appreciative of all of the feedback. I used the suggestions given to me by my peer reviewers. I corrected the grammatical errors and added more citations to sentences where they were needed. I also broke down the evolution section into two parts rather than one large section. I fixed the flow of some of the sentences as well as deleted unnecessary statements. I finally added a few pictures as well as links to some of the topics that might have more information within other articles. Again, I am very thankful for all of the feedback I received as it was extremely helpful.
Ways to improve Evolution of dog breeds
[edit]Hello, Jroberson4,
Thanks for creating Evolution of dog breeds! I edit here too, under the username Onel5969 and it's nice to meet you :-)
I wanted to let you know that I have tagged the page as having some issues to fix, as a part of our page curation process and note that:-
Very nice article, keep up the good work.
The tags can be removed by you or another editor once the issues they mention are addressed. If you have questions, leave a comment here and prepend it with {{Re|Onel5969}}. And, don't forget to sign your reply with ~~~~ . For broader editing help, please visit the Teahouse.
Delivered via the Page Curation tool, on behalf of the reviewer.