User talk:Brooke.hubert/sandbox

Lead section critique Hi Sam,

I think your lead section summarizes William Stern's contributions quite well. I'm not sure if it is notable just on it's own though, but I think it's close! You mentioned you were unsure if we should include his schooling, and I believe we should touch on it briefly as that was a major advancement in his life. I think we should touch on as many things as we can briefly as there were many important aspects of his life, and the lead section can be several small paragraphs.

Brooke.hubert (talk) 22:45, 29 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Good comments, Brooke. I agree. Don't go too in-depth on schooling, but you can certainly mention it. J.R. Council (talk) 20:18, 5 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]

How we have responded to Dr. Council's comments:

I edited the paragraph on child development by changing the first sentence so it was not a run on sentence and so it no longer sounded less choppy, as well as added more information in that paragraph. Brooke.hubert (talk) 18:22, 30 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Feedback

@Brooke.hubert and Sammatzke: Nice work on your draft. A few things you should be before moving it live

Everything in the article needs to be supported by properly-formatted inline citations. If you aren’t sure how to do this, please revisit the section of the training module beginning on here. I added a few {{citation needed}} tags in places where you need them. These are a minimum set - if a single source doesn't cover all the content in the section, then you should add more as needed.
The existing William Stern (psychologist) article says he was born Ludwig Wilhelm and not Louis William. The existing source is a bit equivocal, but while it lists various combinations, "Louis William" isn't one of the listed names. Please check your source to be sure, and make sure you cite it.

Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 23:06, 3 December 2018 (UTC)[reply]

I checked with multiple sources that confirm his name was Louis William, not Ludwig Wilhelm. In Lamiell's biography of Stern, he comments that Stern was named Louis rather than the German equivalent because of his father's affinity for French culture.

Sammatzke (talk) 05:06, 7 December 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Good followup, Samantha! J.R. Council (talk) 21:54, 11 December 2018 (UTC)[reply]