Template:Did you know nominations/Lutz Bachmann

The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Allen3 ^talk 13:40, 23 February 2015 (UTC)

Lutz Bachmann

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• ... that, before resignation as its leader, a photo of Lutz Bachmann, founder of Pegida, an anti-Islam organisation, posing as Adolf Hitler sparked controversy?

• Reviewed: Uma Thurman (song)

Created by 82.136.210.153 (talk). Nominated by George Ho (talk) at 19:28, 25 January 2015 (UTC).

• The hook has too many clauses (commas). How about:
• ALT1: ... that before resigning as head of Pegida, an anti-Islam organisation, Lutz Bachmann posed as Adolf Hitler? Yoninah (talk) 22:18, 14 February 2015 (UTC)

• Commas do not indicate just clauses; there are also phrases, including absolute phrase and prepositional phrase. George Ho (talk) 23:47, 15 February 2015 (UTC)

• Sorry, I'm not an expert in grammar, but I do know which hooks flow better. Yoninah (talk) 11:29, 16 February 2015 (UTC)

• ALT-0b: ... that a photo of Lutz Bachmann—founder of an anti-Islam organisation, Pegida—posing as Adolf Hitler sparked controversy before his resignation as its leader?

• I hope this helps. George Ho (talk) 19:05, 16 February 2015 (UTC)

• Again, I can't explain grammar, but this reads rather choppily. Do you mean:
• ALT2: ... that a photo of Lutz Bachmann posing as Adolf Hitler sparked controversy before his resignation as leader of Pegida, an anti-Islam organisation? Yoninah (talk) 20:44, 16 February 2015 (UTC)

• Full review needed. ALT2 remains; struck earlier hooks due to issues raised (agree on choppiness). BlueMoonset (talk) 15:51, 22 February 2015 (UTC)

• This article is new enough and long enough. One of the sources cited to support the ALT2 hook fails but the others are satisfactory. The article is neutral and I detected no copyright/close paraphrasing issues. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 07:33, 23 February 2015 (UTC)