Jump to content

Talk:Yampa (yacht)/GA1

Page contents not supported in other languages.
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

GA Review

[edit]
GA toolbox
Reviewing

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Eddie891 (talk · contribs) 21:01, 19 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Hi, I'll take this one on soon Eddie891 Talk Work 21:01, 19 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

comments

[edit]
  • Suggest adding years to the lede so the reader has some sense of time.
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 09:34, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • " until 1891" suggest adding what changed in 1891
 Done - after much research I could not find what changed then (e.g. another yacht took its place). --Doug Coldwell (talk) 13:08, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • lengths need {{convert}} in the article body
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:07, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "She participated in various events related to the America's Cup" maybe add what the cup was for readers who don't know (i.e. what types of events might she have participated in?)
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 13:08, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Standardize between "The Yampa" and "Yampa"
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 12:23, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • You link Wilhelm but not Chapin in the infobox?
 Done - linked Chapin. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:35, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "sea-kindliness" maybe put in quotes rather than italics, but I'm not sure
 Done - "sea-kindliness" in quotes. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:44, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "She made many ocean cruises for several years with no significant accidents, and sailors referred to this as sea-kindliness" yet you only have one year chronologically where this sentence is?
 Done copy edit accordingly. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:53, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "calling at" -> "stopping at"?
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:57, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Cuthbert S. Thompson" surely you can mention who he is a bit?
 Done = cousin. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 11:11, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "towed to Kiel, Germany by way of the Kiel Canal" suggest "towed to through the Kiel Canal to Kiel, Germany" but I'm fine either way
 Done - kept original wording.--Doug Coldwell (talk) 11:32, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 11:37, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • " The emperor was very much attracted to the schooner and wished to own it" suggest rephrase along the lines of "The emperor liked the schooner and sought to purchase it" but again that's a minor preference issue, and could go either way
 Done - changed wording.--Doug Coldwell (talk) 11:42, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "He immediately took steps to acquire her for himself" clarify who 'he' is
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 11:52, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The German Royal family enjoyed many cruises" -> "The German Royal family had [or took] many cruises" I'd suggest leaving the reader to decide whether they enjoyed them all
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 11:55, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "international Emperor’s Cup regatta" you should link regatta before this
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 11:57, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Meteor III was built in New York harbor in 1902" I thought she was constructed in Germany?
 Done - news clip reference says at the beginning At Shooters Island, New York harbor... At the end of news clip article it says: ... She was designed and built there.... In Meteor III it says ...built by Townsend-Downey Shipbuilding Company at Shooters Island in New York City... referenced by news clip from Lincoln Journal Star. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 12:11, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • I'm curious how this is in the scope of MILHIST?
 Done - removed. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 13:17, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Do we know the fate of the ship?
 Done - added. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 15:38, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
@Eddie891: I have addresses all issues. Can you take another look at it now. Thanks. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 15:38, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Doug Coldwell, That's it from me then. Much better, and I'm now happy to promote. A little on the short side, but I think it's reasonably comprehensive and well written and well referenced and illustrated. Eddie891 Talk Work 19:09, 20 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Retrieved from "https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Talk:Yampa_(yacht)/GA1&oldid=952140464"