Talk:William B. Purvis

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Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment

This article was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment, between 24 September 2018 and 6 December 2018. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): 打戳残你.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 04:54, 18 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment

This article was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment, between 4 January 2019 and 17 April 2019. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Clarkekent19.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 04:54, 18 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Untitled

Derick Porter: This article had a lot of information on William Purvis. It stated how he was an inventor and spoke about a lot of the creations that he had. However, there are some grammatical errors throughout the article that doesn't allow it to flow as well as it could have. In the "life story" section, there could be some clarity in areas. For example, where in Pennsylvania was Purvis born? Other than the grammatical errors, your article had a lot of good references and links.

Dakota Schneider: I enjoyed your articles format and the multiple links to other articles which is helpful to any curious readers. I also enjoyed the strength of your sources all of them appear to have a solid academic foundation. I would be sure to check grammar and spelling in a few areas nothing major just polishing work. Other than that your article appears ready to post, all that's left is a basic revision. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Daschn16 (talk • contribs) 22:53, 28 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Prof. Smith Feedback: Hi Bingnan, I think that you have a very solid foundation for your final article here. It's clear to me that you've done an immense amount of research and found many interesting and credible sources. It looks like Purvis was more of an inventor than an activist, which I didn't realize, but that's perfectly fine for this assignment as you are bringing attention to a little known person. Your peer reviewers' comments above all ring true for me. I think your main goal for the revision is to polish and proofread the draft to clear up any grammatical errors. Here are some other specific issues I think you should address.

1) Rewrite the title as William B. Purvis. 2) I would take out the "barely known" phrase in the first part of your lead sentence. I'm worried that a Wikipedia editor will decide the subject is not valuable or notable enough to include in Wikipedia if you start that way. I would also *briefly* list a few of his major patents here in the lead. 3) It's unclear what a "bag machine" is throughout the article. Can you explain what kind of machine it was? It made bags? What kind of bags?StaceySmithOSU (talk) 19:03, 1 December 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Bingnan Liu: thanks for you guys feedback. I have proofread my grammar errors. And also add other information about this guy. concern about the bag machine, I also have no idea about it. All my sources just briefly mention the bag machines, but it seems like Mr.Purvis spent a lot of time on it.