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Needs improvement

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This was recreated. Needs a lot of improvement - assuming notable? In ictu oculi (talk) 23:45, 3 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]

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Did you know nomination

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The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by AirshipJungleman29 talk 15:38, 1 December 2023 (UTC)[reply]

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5x expanded by Mintu Martin (talk). Self-nominated at 03:42, 22 September 2023 (UTC). Post-promotion hook changes for this nom will be logged at Template talk:Did you know nominations/Trần Lập; consider watching this nomination, if it is successful, until the hook appears on the Main Page.[reply]

  • Should the subject always be referred to by their full name "Trần Lập" throughout the article? The convention is to use full name in the first sentence, and surname after.
  • Use of time-sensitive content: As of 2020, it was said that their son was in tenth grade and their daughter was in seventh grade. I think maybe this is TMI. It's best not to add information that can change, especially about their children. Not sure this is relevant to the bio.
  • VNG Corporation: I had to read between the lines to figure out this was a technology company behind the ZingMP3 brand and products. It would be helpful to prompt the reader in the first usage instance. For example, "On 3 December 2014, The People's Court of Ho Chi Minh City conducted the first instance of a civil lawsuit for digital rights between Trần Lập and VNG, a technology company that owns the music website ZingMP3. According to his lawsuit claim, Trần Lập accused VNG of having uploaded a recording of his song - "Đường đến vinh quang" on their music website without his permission."
  • Copyediting needed: There's some easy to fix issues with the language, such as in the Legacy section and elsewhere. I don't really know how to fix this statement, so please rewrite it: " During a Bức Tường's performance held in 2011, drawing over 7,000 rock fans, VnExpress wrote that "Trần Lập was occasionally lost his voice" due to "time that has had an significant impact on his voice".
  • Hook: Try to shorten it: "... that the dispute between Trần Lập and VNG was the first ever civil lawsuit about digital content copyright in Vietnam?"
  • More later. Viriditas (talk) 22:35, 22 October 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Second opinion needed. Viriditas (talk) 01:55, 28 October 2023 (UTC)[reply]

  • @Viriditas and Mintu Martin: Regarding naming conventions, Vietnamese names in English text are formally shortened to just their given name, see MOS:GIVENNAME ~~lol1VNIO (I made a mistake? talk to me) 19:46, 31 October 2023 (UTC)[reply]
    @Viriditas: Thank you very much for your comments, I've been waiting for a long time to see such a reply from you. I fixed the hook according to your suggestion. And an user named NightHeron fixed those errors in the article. Mintu Martin (talk) 14:21, 2 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]
    • @Mintu Martin: Thank you for your hard work and for the copyedits from NightHeron. This is not an easy article to review! I think a cursory glance shows that it meets the minimum requirements for DYK and should be passed. I also think the hook is interesting (although I prefer it shorter, it's fine as it is). I'm hoping someone else chimes in with a second opinion. Otherwise, I will complete the review one I am able to do a final read through. Viriditas (talk) 20:59, 2 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]
      • @Mintu Martin: The recent copyedits are a huge improvement, but I just tried to do a read through and noticed that it still needs work. While I could probably fix most of the problems, it's pretty time consuming, and I don't want to accidentally distort the topic with my edits. I'm not sure how to proceed. I'm hoping that others can chime in. Viriditas (talk) 18:30, 3 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

New reviewer requested. I can't pass this article in its current form, but I think there might be other reviewers who will. My personal opinion is that the article needs more copyedits. Viriditas (talk) 21:34, 3 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Long enough, new enough. ALT0 should really read "copyright in Vietnam", but that's an issue for the prepbuilder, and it is interesting and AGF sourced. No maintenance templates found, no copyright issues found, no QPQ needed. Controversies sections are discouraged per WP:CSECTION - could this be spread throughout the article?--Launchballer 02:15, 18 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]
@Launchballer: May I remove those controversies sections in the article? Mintu Martin (talk) 06:56, 20 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]
@Launchballer: Thanks a lot! I edit the article according to your suggestion! Mintu Martin (talk) 07:34, 20 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]
Much better. I've taken the liberty of moving a chunk from the 'personal life' section to the 'other activities' section, but otherwise this is good to go.--Launchballer 09:57, 20 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]
@Launchballer: I've removed malformed usage of {{DYK talk}} in your message. Did you mean {{subst:DYKtick}}? Just wanted to confirm and best wishes, ~~lol1VNIO (I made a mistake? talk to me) 18:54, 21 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]
Yeah, that's... exactly what I meant. Good to go.--Launchballer 22:46, 21 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]


GOCE

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WikiProject iconGuild of Copy Editors
WikiProject iconThis article was copy edited by a member of the Guild of Copy Editors.Guild of Copy EditorsWikipedia:WikiProject Guild of Copy EditorsTemplate:WikiProject Guild of Copy EditorsGuild of Copy Editors articles

NightHeron (talk) 01:28, 2 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

 Done NightHeron (talk) 17:52, 3 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Remove the template

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Hi, @Bonthefox3, I noticed that you had put the template {{Expand Vietnamese}} on the top of the artice, but it has been fully translated from Vietnamese wikipedian. Would you mind removing that template? Mintu Martin (talk) 11:27, 17 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Done! :3 Bonthefox3 (talk) 11:37, 17 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Suggested minor improvements for English-language accessibility

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1. Bức Tường in the lead should have a translation in parentheses.

2. Note that the recently added link for the song “Đường đến ngày vinh quang” is a red-link, and so will not help the reader. I think it might be best to refer to that song by the English translation “Road to Glory Days” (for consistency and sound I’d suggest changing “glorious” to “glory”) in the main body (starting with Lập wrote the song "Road to Glory Days" in 1998), since otherwise readers who know no Vietnamese might be puzzled by the long title and not realize that the title given only in Vietnamese is the same as the one that was translated earlier.

3. Vượt qua thử thách should have a translation in parentheses.

4. Tâm hồn của đá and Vô hình should also have a translation, and so should Những hòn đá lăn later in the same paragraph.

5. Dấu ấn needs a translatoin in parentheses.

6. Bên kia Bức Tường needs a translation in parentheses.

7. Trở về needs a translation in parentheses.

Thanks. NightHeron (talk) 12:17, 17 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@NightHeron Thanks a lot! I edit the article according to your suggestion! Mintu Martin (talk) 07:08, 20 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]
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