Talk:Theme Park (video game)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 22:24, 18 November 2016 (UTC)

As a matter of fact I only ordered this on eBay for the Saturn yesterday! JAGUAR  22:24, 18 November 2016 (UTC)

• "Theme Park is a construction and management simulation game" - just link Construction and management simulation and write out video game, so it reads as: Theme Park is a construction and management simulation video game
• "The game is the first instalment in Bullfrog's Theme series and their Designer Series" - does series need to be italicised here?
• "Development took about a year and a half, and the team were aiming for as much realism as possible" - Development took about a year and a half, with the team aiming for as much realism as possible
• " Research can also make rides more durable, staff more efficient, and buses larger" - the buses themselves become larger or there are more people in them?
• "What gets researched, and how much funding goes into it is determined by the player" - how about something like The topic of research and how much funding goes into it is determined by the player
• "On sandbox, the player doesn't have to worry about those aspects" - informal
• "The Mega Drive and Super NES versions" - why not SNES?
• "In an interview, he explained that the primary reason he created Theme Park is because he wanted" - past tense, "was"
• "simply having fun creating a Theme Park" - no need for capital letters
• Shift the reception table to the right side
• The reception section should be in past tense throughout, unless a review is contemporary
• " but that the Jaguar conversion has confusing menus and dithered text which is excessively difficult to read" - 'had'
• "Sega Saturn Magazine praised the Saturn version" - no need, we can assume that the Sega Saturn Magazine is reviewing the Saturn version anyway. I'd replace it with "the game". Also, Sam Hickman is the reviewer, so add Sam Hickman of the Sega Saturn Magazine
• " Jeuxvideo.com commended the visuals and "British" humour" - no need for quote marks
• "Reviewing the Super NES version" - again, why not SNES?
• No dead links

This is well researched and solid. On hold JAGUAR  13:16, 19 November 2016 (UTC)

@Jaguar: How's the article now? I've also added a bit more content. EDIT: I think Designer Series is a trademark, so I'm guessing Series is supposed to be italicised. Adam9007 (talk) 03:12, 20 November 2016 (UTC)

Looks great! This should be good to go now as it meets the criteria. Another Bullfrog GA JAGUAR  11:50, 20 November 2016 (UTC)