Talk:The Unraveling (Rise Against album)

Hmm... (and update)

What else should be added for this page? It wasn't a huge debut, and I'm running out of things to add. I've searched a lot on-line for more reviews to add to the "Release and Reception" category, but I don't know what else to put. --Silverskylines (talk) 20:31, 15 November 2010 (UTC)

Also, I'm going to take out the Transistor Revolt demo because it's getting kind of out-of-place as I continue to improve this article. If anyone disagrees, that's cool. --Silverskylines (talk) 20:46, 16 November 2010 (UTC)

Everchanging

I'm deleting the section called "Everchanging" (under the section "Song Meanings", as it is for some reason thrown in there to describe what the song is about, when the meaning of the song is completely obvious if you read the lyrics.

CrayZsaaron (talk) 12:50, 15 November 2009 (UTC)

Fair use rationale for Image:The Unraveling.jpg

Image:The Unraveling.jpg is being used on this article. I notice the image page specifies that the image is being used under fair use but there is no explanation or rationale as to why its use in this Wikipedia article constitutes fair use. In addition to the boilerplate fair use template, you must also write out on the image description page a specific explanation or rationale for why using this image in each article is consistent with fair use.

Please go to the image description page and edit it to include a fair use rationale. Using one of the templates at Wikipedia:Fair use rationale guideline is an easy way to insure that your image is in compliance with Wikipedia policy, but remember that you must complete the template. Do not simply insert a blank template on an image page.

If there is other fair use media, consider checking that you have specified the fair use rationale on the other images used on this page. Note that any fair use images lacking such an explanation can be deleted one week after being tagged, as described on criteria for speedy deletion. If you have any questions please ask them at the Media copyright questions page. Thank you.

BetacommandBot (talk) 02:38, 12 February 2008 (UTC)

Lyrical Themes neutrality

I don't believe this section displays proper neutrality as defined in WP:Neutrality. While it is well-written, it sounds more like a review that happens to mention a couple of themes. Also, it does not provide lyrical examples of these themes which might justify its' inclusion in the article. I would however, congratulate the writer on spurring my interest to hear the album for myself. --Crimson Bleeding Souls (talk) 20:47, 29 March 2009 (UTC)

I deleted it. It was a direct copy-paste from the Allmusic review. DaddyTwoFoot (talk) 00:52, 23 May 2009 (UTC)

• Ah, all right. --Crimson Bleeding Souls (talk) 03:00, 6 June 2009 (UTC)

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:The Unraveling/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Adabow (talk · contribs) 05:04, 5 January 2011 (UTC)

• Some dab links and dodgy external links that need fixing. Adabow (talk · contribs) 05:04, 5 January 2011 (UTC)

Nice work, it has the basics, but there are a few issues mentioned below, mostly to do with elaborating and more in-depth discussion of information. The article also needs a bit of copyediting; I have raised a few problems in the prose, but please run through the entire article and give it a touch-up. I'll place the review on hold, awaiting improvements. Adabow (talk · contribs) 10:36, 5 January 2011 (UTC)

Unfortunately, the main contributor has been inactive lately, so after 18 days on hold I will fail the review. Any editors may renominate the article at WP:GAN after addressing points raised here. Adabow (talk · contribs) 05:51, 22 January 2011 (UTC)

Lead

• "debut full-length album" → debut studio album
• "Mass Giorgini produced the album at Sonic Iguana Studios in Lafayette, Indiana, in December 2000" - mention later per MOS:LEAD
• "Although The Unraveling did not rank on any of the Billboard 200 charts" → Although The Unraveling did not rank on any record charts
• The lead needs to generally be expanded and go into a little further detail. For example, you do not mention the reception of the reissue, and I see nothing about the musical style.
• Also, references are not needed in the lead, as the lead should not contain new material, and therefore info should be referenced later on

Background

• "Rise Against existed for over a year as local Chicago band "Transistor Revolt" before..." → Rise Against existed for over a year as local Chicago band, "Transistor Revolt", before...
• "before recording their debut" - debut what?
• "although it was added as a bonus track to the 2005 Reissue" - reissue needs lower case 'r'

Style and composition

• This section needs more linking of genres and sub-genres
• File:401 Kill.ogg needs reducing to less than 19.9 seconds, and should be of lower quality, per WP:SAMPLE
  • Same with File:Join the Ranks.ogg (reduce to less than 8.6 seconds)
• "In The Age interview" → In the interview with The Age
• "The first 15 seconds of "Reception Fades" are taken from 1997's Henry Fool." - how was it taken from the film?

Release and reception

• Divide this section up. Make 'Commercial' its own level two section, like 'Release and promotion', and 'Critical' to level two section 'Critical reception'
• "Fat Wreck Chords released The Unraveling on April 21, 2001, in the United States on LP and CD formats" – comma after 'States'
• "The album and the 2005 reissue did not rank on any major music charts" → The album did not rank on any record charts
• "The band participated in the 2001 "Fuck the World Tour"" - no quote marks around tours
• "during which the band heavily promoted their debut" - debut what?
• "On the tour, the band met Chris Chasse, who was then a member of Reach the Sky as lead guitarist and later joined Rise Against in 2004 after the departure of Mohney" - comma after 'guitarist'. You also need to mention Mohney's departure here
• "Rise Against signed to Fat Wreck Chords again in 2003 to record their sophomore album, Revolutions Per Minute" - source?
• The Allmusic review ref should be updated to link directly to the review page

2005 reissue

• "The re-issue was met with positive critical acclaim" -no hyphen everywhere else, so why here?

Track listing

• Source for writers?

References

• Make sure that only printed sources (ie books, magazines, newspapers etc) are italicised, and not websites

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

---

This review is transcluded from Talk:The Unraveling (album)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: DannyMusicEditor (talk · contribs) 19:58, 21 November 2016 (UTC)

As part of a review deal, I'd be happy to review this, but I'm going to start on Thursday, possibly Wednesday. Hope to see another wonderful passing article! dannymusiceditor ^{Speak up!} 19:58, 21 November 2016 (UTC)

1. Is it reasonably well written?

   A. Prose is "clear and concise", without copyvios, or spelling and grammar errors:

   B. MoS compliance for lead, layout, words to watch, fiction, and lists:

2. Is it factually accurate and verifiable?

   A. Has an appropriate reference section:

   B. Cites reliable sources, where necessary:

   C. No original research:

3. Is it broad in its coverage?

   A. Major aspects:

   B. Focused (see summary style):

4. Is it neutral?

   Fair representation without bias:

5. Is it stable?

   No edit wars, etc:

6. Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?

   A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:

   B. Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:

   It seems Wikipedia doesn't have an appropriate one available.

7. Overall:

   Pass or Fail:

Toolbox checks

Everything in the GA toolbox checks out fine.

Lead & Infobox

• Album cover needs alt text, something I neglected to catch in "Give It All" (oops!)

Done, but if I do remember correctly, alt text is not a requirement for GA, just for FA. So if you ever do a review and ask for alt text, I believe that the nominator is allowed to say no. As for the alt text I added, it's really cut and dry, but for now it works. It's really late out here and I'm working the graveyard shift at my job, so I'm not really in the best mindset to try and accurately describe the album cover.

That must be fun

• As a result of their newfound exposure... What exposure? Elaborate on that in or before the current sentence.

There really is no mention of any exposure, I just figured that having a sentence begin that way would be a good transition. I revised the sentence. It's not the best and I've been trying to figure out how to rewrite it, but for now it works.

• Recording took place over the course of five weeks...

Done

• Link "critics" to music journalism

Done

• who praised the hardcore music

Done

• Why were the liner notes updated? Just cause it's 2005 and the band's lineup changed, or what? Elaborate, but don't overdo it for the lead.

Just rewrote it to say that it was released to coincide with the band's fifth anniversary, which is the more important part.

• Might want to indicate that it was out of print at one point (that's why it was reissued, right?)

Possibly, but just because the album is out of print on CD format doesn't mean that it's important enough to mention in the lead. This was more of an offhanded comment that Fat Wreck Chords just so happened to mentioned in the ref.

• A flatlist or hlist template is preferable for multiple genres, highly suggest even though not totally necessary.

Agree, done

Background and recording

• No comma necessary with Toni & Tim.

Done

• Might want to indicate that Tim was fresh out of leaving the bass position in Arma Angelus (possibly because of Rise Against), a metalcore band which featured all of Fall Out Boy's members at one point or another. Who knew, right?

I've known about this connection for a while, but the only ref I've found about McIlrath's involvement with Arma Angelus was an offhanded comment in an MTV interview back in 2006. However, I did mention McIlrath's previous involvement with Baxter, a band that he was the frontman for and constantly talks about.

• Possibly indicate Fat Mike is the NOFX vocalist? They did have notable success.

Tbh, I'm debating on this one. In the given context, it's only important to mention that Fat Mike is co-founder of Fat Wreck Chords, his involvement with another band unrelated to Rise Against is not necessary.

• Again with the exposure thing.

Reworded

• No need to spell out Sonic Iguana Studios twice so soon.

Done

Style and composition

• Jack Black isn't just an actor. He was in the process of making music and had become a musician at this point.

Hm, I always that he started Tenacious D after a few 90s comedy movies, but I added that he's also a musician

• fast pace fast-paced

Done

• Is "harder in sound" the best description you can possibly give?

Reworded

• more punk rock inspired more inspired by punk rock

Done

• "Everchaning" ???

Whoops, that must have slipped through the proof-read cracks. Done

• The eleventh track, "Everchaning", is a tune-oriented song, What's a tune-oriented song?

Working on this, just need to figure out the best way to phrase it.

Release and reception

• I don't think you're allowed to cite Wikipedia as a source even in this case. That being said, I don't think it needs sourced anyway. That'd be a WP:BLUE thing, I think. An FAC can correct me on that if I'm wrong.

Yeah I figured as much. How does it look now? I thought it might be a good idea to link to their discography, but I can just remove it entirely, since your right, it doesn't need to be sourced.

• No comma necessary after "My Life Inside Your Heart"

Done

• Add the Exclaim! review to the review box

Done, although Exclaim! did not give a score, so I just wrote positive.

Events after the album's release

I've never seen a post-release section in a GA album article. The first paragraph I think should be moved to the background section, the second to release.

Done

Alright, that's everything! Go! dannymusiceditor ^{Speak up!} 02:56, 26 November 2016 (UTC)

After-comment: Looked at the review, and saw most of the work in this edit. I have to say, there were some things there that I liked that we don't have now. Some of those reviews I see are okay. I'd like you to restore the AltSounds review, both Punknews reviews (as it is reliable) and the second Sputnikmusic review. Only the initial reviews need to be put in the box, but please do mention the re-issue comments in the critical reception section. I am not positive if Punkbands.org is reliable, I've never seen it. Safe to keep out for now. dannymusiceditor ^{Speak up!} 03:54, 27 November 2016 (UTC)

Just wanted to comment before editing the article. I'm fine with restoring the AltSounds review, as it is indeed a reliable source. However, since the reviewers called themselves "AppleBottom", I wasn't quite sure on the reliability of that one reviewer. As for the Punknews reviews, neither review was done by a staff member. According to WP:ALBUM/SOURCE, only staff reviews, recognizable by a tag. Neither Ground Control Magazine or Punkbands are listed as reliable sources for reviews according to Wikipedia. Also, for the other Punknews sources I use, I only used articles that were posted by staff members, as anonymous members can also post news updates. As for the comments, I'll get on them right now. Famous Hobo (talk) 04:06, 27 November 2016 (UTC)

Oh, they weren't staff? Considering that this was nearly a GA almost five years ago I'd have thought that someone caught that. I made an assumption. Did you find anything reliable on Arma Angelus' relation to Tim? And at least explain to me what they mean by the vague expression "tune-oriented song". dannymusiceditor ^{Speak up!} 17:59, 27 November 2016 (UTC)

Yeah the article review was alright back then, but it just missed the non reliable album reviews. I've addressed now all but one comment, and that should be done by tomorrow. Also, would you like me to add the AltSounds review, even with the possibly questionable reviewer? Famous Hobo (talk) 08:25, 29 November 2016 (UTC)

I would like that, but you don't have to list the author if you don't like it. dannymusiceditor ^{Speak up!} 19:47, 29 November 2016 (UTC)

In case you're having trouble finding references related to Arma Angelus, FOB, and Tim, here are a few good ones: [1] [2] dannymusiceditor ^{Speak up!} 03:49, 30 November 2016 (UTC)

Alright, now every comment has been taken care of. Personally, I probably don't think it's important to mention McIlrath's involvement with Arma Angelus in the article. Definitely for McIlrath's article, but since this is about the album, I don't think it's relevant. Famous Hobo (talk) 04:08, 30 November 2016 (UTC)

I believe it is important to make a brief mention. (that's where he was before he joined the band...right? Did I get my history wrong?) Anyway, if you won't do it, that's okay, I'll just be bold and fix myself after I pass it. dannymusiceditor ^{Speak up!} 04:22, 30 November 2016 (UTC)