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Talk:Seasons (Ayumi Hamasaki song)/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: Carbrera (talk · contribs) 01:46, 3 April 2016 (UTC)[reply]


Hello, I am Carbrera, and I'll be reviewing this article for possible good article submission.

Full review coming very soon. Carbrera (talk) 01:46, 3 April 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox

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  • The caption isn't needed since it's the same on all formats

Lead

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Paragraph 1

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  • I would add "single" before trilogy so readers aren't confused

Paragraph 2

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  • You list "J-pop" in the infobox, but "Japanese pop" in the lead, so make both of them the same please
  • Songwriting is one word
  • Change to "...making it Hamasaki's best selling single."

Paragraph 3

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  • Nada

Background and release

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Paragraph 1

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  • The hidden text isn't necessary here; if you find it necessary, I would avoid shouting
  • Remove the "s" after seconds in the audio sample description

Paragraph 2

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  • I would switch around this paragraph and the first one; I don't know, it flows better in my opinion–what are your thoughts on this?
  • Instead of "describes Hamasaki's future", I would say "predicts Hamasaki's future"

Paragraph 3

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  • "making videos" → "making-of videos"
  • Change to "The CD and digital cover sleeve have an image" please

Critical reception

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  • Again, songwriting is one word
  • The third sentence uses the word "singled" but I'm not sure what it's trying to say/what it means
  • 100% of the votes? Are you sure? Does that mean every person who voted picked this song?

Commercial performance

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  • Add a topic sentence stating that "Seasons" was a success please
  • Remove "at" after "Vogue/Far Away/Seasons" reached..."
  • The third and second to last sentence should use a semicolon to separate instead of a period (full stop)

Music video

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Paragraph 1

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  • Outtake is one word

Synopsis

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  • Superimposed is also one word
  • Change "with a video of two children" to "with a scene of two children" to reduce the amount of "videos" in that sentence

Live performances and other appearances

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Paragraph 1

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  • Are there available links to any of the tours you mentioned in this paragraph?

Paragraph 2

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  • Same with above, are there any available links for the concert performances that you mentioned? Add if applicable please
  • You can add the years to the concert tours in parentheses after the tour name please (I would highly recommend this, especially since some tours last over several years.)

Paragraph 3

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  • List the actual albums instead of saying "The list is:..." like you did in my other review comments from previous articles you nominated

Credits and personnel

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  • The first column (if odd) should have the extra bullet point
  • I don't think "Avex Trax" needs to be included here, so if you remove it, it would also take care of the above problem/comment

Track listing

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  • Pluralize the title and add "formats" so it reads as "Track listings and formats"

Charts and certifications

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Certification

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  • What does it mean to be certified "Million"?
  • If million is a certification, you need to pluralize the section subtitle to "Certifications"

References

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  • Like with the rest of my reviews, please double check that only one link is provided for each publisher/website/etc. Thanks!

End of GA Review:

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Great work yet again! I will put it on hold so you can make any changes. Thanks! Carbrera (talk) 04:40, 16 April 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Carbrera: Done and dusted! CaliforniaDreamsFan (talk · contribs} 05:23, 18 April 2016 (UTC)[reply]