Talk:Pentemont Abbey

This is the talk page for discussing improvements to the Pentemont Abbey article.
This is not a forum for general discussion of the article's subject.

Put new text under old text. Click here to start a new topic.
New to Wikipedia? Welcome! Learn to edit; get help.

Article policies

Find sources: Google (books · news · scholar · free images · WP refs) · FENS · JSTOR · TWL

Pentemont Abbey has been listed as one of the History good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it.
Review: April 21, 2015. (Reviewed version).

It is requested that an image or photograph of the interior of the church including the organ and dome be included in this article to improve its quality. Please replace this template with a more specific media request template where possible.
Wikipedians in Paris may be able to help!
The Free Image Search Tool or Openverse Creative Commons Search may be able to locate suitable images on Flickr and other web sites.

Upload

A fact from Pentemont Abbey appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 27 April 2015 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:

Did you know... that when Thomas Jefferson's daughter Martha expressed a desire to become a nun, he ended her education at Pentemont Abbey?

A record of the entry may be seen at Wikipedia:Recent additions/2015/April. The nomination discussion and review may be seen at Template:Did you know nominations/Pentemont Abbey.

Wikipedia

France Low‑importance

	France portal This article is within the scope of WikiProject France, a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of France on Wikipedia. If you would like to participate, please visit the project page, where you can join the discussion and see a list of open tasks.FranceWikipedia:WikiProject FranceTemplate:WikiProject FranceFrance articles
Low	This article has been rated as Low-importance on the project's importance scale.

Architecture Low‑importance

	Architecture portal This article is within the scope of WikiProject Architecture, a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of Architecture on Wikipedia. If you would like to participate, please visit the project page, where you can join the discussion and see a list of open tasks.ArchitectureWikipedia:WikiProject ArchitectureTemplate:WikiProject ArchitectureArchitecture articles
Low	This article has been rated as Low-importance on the project's importance scale.

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

This review is transcluded from Talk:Pentemont Abbey/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Calvin999 (talk · contribs) 12:47, 20 April 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

I think this could be be two paragraphs, instead of one large one, a two sentence one, and a six word one.
Avoid using citations in the lead, presumably they are in the main bodies of prose below?

History - Beauvais (1217-1672)

For this purpose → For what purpose? Perhaps remove.
orchard just to the southwest → orchard southwest
Philip died → You've spelt Philip differently to the previous sentence?
was brought to completion → was completed
his successor as bishop, Milo of Nanteuil, → his successor, Bishop Milo of Nanteuil,
the necessary funds, → funds (it's obvious that funding is necessary)
allowing for its completion in 1218. → and it was completed in 1218
on the 8th of June, 1230, → on 8 June 1230
inviolable → What does this mean? Do you mean inviable?
They followed her to Pentemont however → However, they followed her to the Pentemont
At the time the → At the time, the

History - Paris (1672-1790)

The winning proposal however was from Pierre Contant d'Ivry the completion of which would only be achieved after his death. → The winning proposal, however, was from Pierre Contant d'Ivry, but the completion of which would only be achieved after his death.
Link Thomas Jefferson
Who is Abigail Adams?
Conditions were spartan for the students, → Use an alternative to 'spartan'

State Property (1790-2015) - Military

Comma after French Revolution
In 1835 the → comma after 'the'
In 1835 the building was expanded to Rue de Bellechasse which required the demolition of some parts of the original structure. Under the Second Empire the abbey served as the barracks of the Cent-gardes Squadron, an elite cavalry unit that provided personal protection for Napoleon III and the Tuileries Palace. → This needs citing.
In the twentieth century → comma after 'century'
In 1937 a bunker → comma after 1937
It sounds like normal pushbikes where used, can you link to the type of bicycle you mean?

State Property (1790-2015) - Protestant Church

What is millet?
After the Concordat of 1801 provided formal recognition of the Reformed Church in France → comma after France
Since the Revocation of the Edict of Nantes in 1685 → Comm after 1685
Is this also meant to be 1865? The rest of the dates in this sub-section are in the 1800s?

List of Abbesses of Pentemont

Don't put the citation in the section heading. Underneath the two lists, just put "Source:"

Outcome

On hold for 7 days. — ₳aron 17:20, 20 April 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for your review and comments. I've edited the article accordingly. Let me know what you think. Djkeddie (talk) 17:17, 21 April 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks. Just tweaked the lead. Passing. — ₳aron 17:38, 21 April 2015 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.