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Reviewer: Hog Farm (talk · contribs) 04:32, 17 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

You've reviewed many of my articles, I'll help you out and review this one. Hog Farm Bacon 04:32, 17 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Lead
  • " and the most famous of his poems during Whitman's life." - Maybe this is just me, but it feels unneccesarily clunky
  • cut to "the most famous during his life" how does that seem?
Background
  • Link Drump-Taps at the first mention, not the second
  • linked
  • Was there specific content in Leaves of Grass that was found objectional? Given that several of the quotes in the reception section talk about Whitman not be filthy for once, it would probably be okay to give a little more background into why he got kind of a naughty image in the public mind
  • Added a little bit, mostly critics found it far to sexual and objected to some homosexual overtones, which were unpopular to say the least in that day and age.
Publication history
  • "It's final republication by Whitman was in the 1881 edition of Leaves of Grass." - Drop the apostrophe
  • Done
  • It's implied that the reason Whitman did not like this poem was that it was to ubiquitous, but this isn't stated directly. Do any of the secondary sources provide commentary on why Whitman didn't like it? All that's given is a couple of quotes, and the reader is left to draw their own conclusions. This works if the secondary sources don't elaborate, bu if there's some elaboration, that would be nice to add
  • I'll look into it
  • I'm afraid that my sources don't elaborate. My OR guess is not that he actually disliked the poem but that he was frustrated it became known instead of all of his free verse work, which he felt was the far more representative of himself and his work, but unfortunately Eddie 2020 is not an acceptable source :P
Analysis
  • "Stefan Schöberlein writes that the poem "has largely been ignored in English speaking academia due to its sentimentality", with the exception of a 2000 analysis by Helen Vendler.[19]" - Should this get moved to the reception section?
  • Schöberlein here was most likelyreferring here to the fact that the poem hasn't been analysed much, which is why I used it to set up the analysis section, but could move it if you wanted.
  • "Utilizes elements of war journalism, including "the bleeding drops of red" and "fallen cold and dead"" - Sentence fragment
  • fixed. There's no real great place to put this sentence, unfortunately.
In popular culture
  • "Captain reference full circle, ending with the students standing on their desks (to the fury of Mr. Nolan) and addressing Keating as "O Captain! My Captain!", as a final farewell to him" - Unclear who Mr. Nolan is
  • cut, retained from a old version with more detail (fancruft, really)
References
  • Can we get publishing locations for Dimare and Rush?
  • sure
  • "From Noon to Starry Night: A Life of Walt Whitman. Chikago: Ivan R. Dee." - Chicago is misspelled
  • fixed
  • Need several ISBNs here: Blodgett, Callow, Eiselein, Price & Folsom, Reynolds.
added (some got OCLCs instead)
  • Need either an ISBN or an OCLC, not sure which one they will have: Coyle, Loving 1975, Miller, Whitman 1961
added
  • Need locations for: Aaron, Blodgett, Coyle, Eiselein, Lewis, Kummings, Pannapacker, Parini, Podlecki
added
  • Be consistent with state abbreviations: You use the style of SC, but you also use N.J. and Calif. Pick one and stick with it
went with spelling them out
  • Spell out University of Nebraska Press
  • done
  • "Aaron, Daniel (2003-01-08)" - Only saw the year there. Might as well just strip the books down to the year, as it's hard to pin down a specific day
  • done
  • Some of the title are in sentence case, others are in Title Case. Be consistent
Think all the books are now in title case

Overall, good work as usual. Most of my comments are picky ones about reference formatting. Hog Farm Bacon 22:26, 17 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

  • Hog Farm: responded to the quick ones, I'll get around to the more time-consuming ones shortly-- time has been caught up in the real world this weekend, I'm afraid. I haven't forgotten about your source review-- I've emailed the university requesting the books, but for some odd reason they don't want non-students waltzing into the library at random, so I need to set up a pick up time-- something about a global pandemic? Anyways, should have them in the next couple days. Cheers, Eddie891 Talk Work 20:54, 18 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Hog Farm I think that's it? Many thanks for the review so far. Eddie891 Talk Work 23:19, 28 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]