Talk:Miniature Schnauzer/GA1
GA Review
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Reviewer: Cwmhiraeth (talk · contribs) 09:17, 3 September 2013 (UTC)
- I propose to take on this review. I had a miniature schnauzer some years ago but it did not get on well with my free-range hens! Cwmhiraeth (talk) 09:17, 3 September 2013 (UTC)
The article in general is well-written. There are a few points I noticed about the prose:
- "Almost every living Miniature Schnauzer in America can trace their lineage back to Dorem Display" - this should be "its lineage".
Done Changed.
- "Miniature Schnauzers have a squarely proportioned build" - I'm not sure precisely what this means. Could you phrase it differently?
- Done Changed to "Miniature Schnauzers have a very square-shaped build" but I'm not sure that's clear enough, either.
- "They have a double coat. The exterior fur is wiry and the undercoat is soft." - Perhaps these two short sentences could be combined.
- Done Combined.
- "The coat is kept short on the body, but the hair on ears, legs, and belly are retained." - This requires some explanation as (some of the) hairs on the body are retained also. It also needs a reference as the one at the end of the paragraph refers only to the colours.
- Done Rephrased to be clearer and adding a ref to the the American Miniature Schnauzer Club.
- "Miniature Schnauzers are often described as non-shedding dogs, and while this is not entirely true, their shedding is minimal and generally unnoticeable." - Maybe you could substitute "moulting" for one of the words "shedding".
- Done
- "... can be treated with a variety of protocols" - I wouldn't say you could treat a medical condition with a protocol. You could say "... according to a number of protocols".
- Done Changed to methods.
- You need a reference for #2 of "Health and grooming".
- Done I oouldn't confirm hip dysplasia so i pulled it and combined the couple sentences on vWD with the paragraph above.
- "... on their undercarriage..." - "their" is plural while you have been talking about the dog's coat in the singular.
- Done Changed.
- "... minis, Standards, or Giants" - Minis should have a capital M for consistency.
- Done Changed.
- Finally, the statement "The breed remains one of the most popular world wide, primarily for its temperament and relatively small size. As of 2008 it is the 11th most popular breed in the U.S." appears in the lead but this is not mentioned in the body of the article.
- Done Added to the end of the history section.
- That's all I can see for the moment. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 10:18, 3 September 2013 (UTC)
GA Criteria
[edit]- 1a The article is well written.
- 1b The article conforms with the MOS guidelines and the suggestions I made have been implemented.
- 2a&b The article is well referenced and has inline citations for all contentious statements.
- 2c There is no original research as far as I can see.
- 3a&b The coverage is broad enough and the article does not include irrelevant material.
- 4 The article is neutral
- 5 The article was worked on intensively by the nominator in July 2013 and is stable.
- 6 The images are appropriately licensed.
- 7 The images are relevant to the topic and have suitable captions.
- Overall assessment - Pass. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 12:18, 6 September 2013 (UTC)