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Talk:MacGyver (2016 TV series) season 1

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GA Review

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This review is transcluded from Talk:MacGyver (2016 TV series, season 1)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 10:47, 22 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]


Comments

  • "the CBS action-adventure" is a WP:SEAOFBLUE.
  • "the 2016–17 television season." the American TV season...
  • departed in "Screwdriver"" this is without context, was that the first episode, the last episode or what?
  • Similar comment applies to the following sentence.
  • "The first season ranked #27 for " avoid the use of hash for "number", per MOS:HASH.
  • " The series was also renewed" why "also"?
  • Where is production code referenced?
  • " Swiss Army Knife" no need for a capital K.
  • " infiltrates a party to steal a biological weapon" what? McGuyver's stealing a biological weapon from a party?
  • "recruit hacker and convict" any reason that couldn't be "recruit convicted hacker"?
  • Link IED.
  • " extracts it from the bomb" it's not immediately clear that IED == bomb.
  • "caused knowledge of the DXS to become compromised" it's not the knowledge which has been compromised, it's knowledge of the existence of DXS which has caused DXS to become compromised, surely?
  • " Elsewhere, Nikki disappears during transport, leaving the cuffs " no-one mentioned she was arrested or handcuffed...
  • "escaped FBI custody" FBI? Not mentioned before.
  • " at Nikki's place" a little too colloquial, stick with "apartment".
  • "an attack somewhere" - no need for somewhere.
  • " can actually kill him" no need for "actually".
  • " CGI software" worth a link.
  • "as he hasn't talked" avoid contractions.
  • " connect over The Price Is Right. " link the gameshow.
  • "she can't arrest" avoid contractions, check the rest of the article, there are others.
  • First five episodes have large synopses versus the remainder. I would suggest you look at trimming them down a little bit, or at least attempting to beef up the latter so there's a level of consistency between them all.
  • " a similarly explosive predicament, Mac must overcome his haunted past to defeat his rival and save Jack." this reads more like the back of a DVD case than an encyclopedic summary of the episode.
  • "Mac must outlast the crafty killer in a game of cat and mouse" similarly.
  • "none other than Patricia Thornton. Macgyver" tone again, and capital G in MacGyver.
  • "the chopper carrying" helicopter.
  • "Mac & Jack" and. Fix others.
  • " & her Boyfriend named " and, boyfriend.
  • " give an old buddy of his" tone.
  • "Ruler" synopsis far too short, and a spaced hyphen in there, should be a spaced en-dash.
  • "of Hawaii Five-O for" italics.
  • "but only twenty-one were produced" any reason why?
  • "filmed in Oahu, Hawaii on " comma after Hawaii.
  • "On March 8, 2016 George Eads " comma after 2016.
  • Avoid SHOUTING in reference titles.
  • THR is usually given in italics.
  • "Release Dates" dates.
  • "MacGyver Season 1" season.
  • Ref 77 has a spaced hyphen, should be an en-dash.

That's it on a first pass, plenty to do around the synopses so I'll put it on hold. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 08:18, 9 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Just a courtesy message I definitely plan on fixing the issues you've found within the next few days. I've just been busy with real life things recently and have struggled to find time for Wikipedia but I'll make time for this review sometime this week. TheDoctorWho (talk) 15:09, 16 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
@The Rambling Man: Alright, I've fixed most of the issues. In the ref titles where shouting exists it's because the titles on those pages are written that way (it's a direct copy-paste) but if you prefer I fix it I can. Outside of that the only other thing I didn't fix was the length of the episode summaries, MOS:TV doesn't state a minimum on what episode summaries have to be just a max which is followed here. Is that a big issue that needs fixed. Thanks! TheDoctorWho (talk) 01:47, 23 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
TheDoctorWho sorry, I've overlooked your response. I'll do my best to give it a re-review later today and get back to you properly. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 12:18, 30 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Status query

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The Rambling Man, TheDoctorWho, where does this review stand? There doesn't appear to have been a re-review at the end of September, and I see that The Rambling Man hasn't edited since the end of November, with farewell notices posted to his talk page in the days following. If this needs a new reviewer, I can always call for a second opinion/reviewer in the hopes that this could be finished up, since it has been on hold for over three months. BlueMoonset (talk) 21:59, 11 December 2019 (UTC)[reply]

@BlueMoonset: I've been a bit busy recently and haven't had a chance to respond. Dweller posted a message on my talk page about this and offered to pick it up if me if I wanted (which I'll probably take them up on). In my experience with TRM's reviews, he generally finds most issues the first time 'round so whoever picks it up probably just needs to give it a second review and make sure TRM didn't miss anything. I'll respond to Dweller soon and hopefully this GAN will be wrapped up soon. Thanks! TheDoctorWho (Happy Christmas!) 02:56, 12 December 2019 (UTC)[reply]
TheDoctorWho, thanks for your reply. I'm glad you're all set, and imagine I'll see this review finish before too much longer. BlueMoonset (talk) 02:59, 12 December 2019 (UTC)[reply]
@Dweller and TheDoctorWho: How are we sitting on this one? AIRcorn (talk) 21:47, 15 January 2020 (UTC)[reply]
@Aircorn: Last message I got was from Dweller here. TheDoctorWho (Happy Christmas!) 22:17, 15 January 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Okay. Looks like it will get underway soon. AIRcorn (talk) 04:23, 16 January 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Back in the game

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Apologies for the brief interlude, pesky Arbcom business etc. Anyway, here we go, some final thoughts.

  • Still not clear where production code is referenced?
  • AVOID SHOUTING in the ref titles.
  • "MacGyver Season 1" in "Home video release" title, no need for capital S.

Otherwise the rest looks in order. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 08:39, 24 February 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@The Rambling Man: I had added the prodcode reference at one point, looks like another editor removed it for an unknown reason but I've re-added it. I fixed the capital s in the home video release section. You've stated it again but not sure if the question was actually answered, in the ref titles where the shouting exists, it's written that way in the ref. If you still think it needs fixed, I'll do it no problem but just bring awareness to it first? TheDoctorWho (talk) 16:47, 6 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
TheDoctorWho, see MOS:ALLCAPS. Although they don't mention reference titles specifically, it's a standard thing to do when faced with all caps text. I've addressed the four instances that I found in the article, and further fixed one of them that had an odd issue. Hope this gets you to the finish line! BlueMoonset (talk) 23:24, 6 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
@BlueMoonset: Thanks for the response, I'll keep that in mind on other articles moving forward elsewhere, with that said The Rambling Man everything should be addressed now. TheDoctorWho (talk) 04:20, 7 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Looks good to me. I'm promoting. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 18:57, 8 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
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