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GA Review

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Reviewer: Amitchell125 (talk · contribs) 21:14, 21 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]


I am happy to review the article. Amitchell125 (talk) 21:15, 21 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Initial assessment

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  1. Well-written:
    1. the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct; and
      • The whole article is generally written to a high standard, I will ce anything I find once amendments to the article have been completed.
    2. it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation.
  2. Verifiable with no original research:
    1. it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline;
    2. reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose);
      • Please see below for changes to be made.
    3. it contains no original research; and
    4. it contains no copyright violations or plagiarism.
  3. Broad in its coverage:
    1. it addresses the main aspects of the topic; and
      • See below for issues that need to be sorted.
    2. it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style).
  4. Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each.
  5. Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute.
  6. Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio:
    1. media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content; and
    2. media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions.

I'll update the review as I complete the unchecked sections. Nice work so far. Amitchell125 (talk) 07:51, 22 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]

The images are fine, I've added one from the NPG, London. A short clip of Philipson from Pathé News ([1]) would be worth including in the External links section. Amitchell125 (talk) 10:15, 22 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Assessment

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Acting career

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  • Provide a new url for any newspaper citations currently linked to Lancs Library Services (references 3abcd, 4, 5ab, 6 and 7) , as only someone living there with a library barcode can access the website via the article. This needs to be done for references outside this section as well.
    I'll have a look for a more generic Gale Group link for each of the citations. They are certainly accessible outside Lancs WormTT(talk) 08:19, 26 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
I was able to find all the provincial newpaper articles from British Newspaper Archive (this is their website). I did it via Norfolk County Council, using my library card. I can get hold of the links again if needs be. Amitchell125 (talk) 20:18, 23 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Amitchell125 I don't have access to BNA any more, so have based my links on the preview - I obviously still have access through Gale. Can you spot check the BNA links? Also, BNA doesn't include the Daily Mail, so I've left them linked to Gale. It is quite possible to access papers from the information included by physically going to any library which keeps the publication, so I do think we're covered on citations. WormTT(talk) 11:13, 10 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
All ready done, so that's sorted. Amitchell125 (talk) 11:46, 10 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • The start of 'Acting career' needs its own section 'Early life'
I cant stand tiny sections, but have pulled that one out. WormTT(talk) 08:19, 26 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • See here and here regarding the uncertainty over Mabel Russell's date of birth. The article should include something about it.
    I've can't seem to get anything out of the FreeBMD - and haven't used either previously. Being born on a bank holiday, it's not terribly surprising the dates don't quite match up, and had decided to use the reliable Oxford Dictionary of National Biography. I'm happy to add in a bit of vagueness / alternate date of 2nd Jan if you still think it's worth it. WormTT(talk) 08:19, 26 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
    It's not that the dates don't quite match up, it's that they differ by a year. The ODNB gives her dob as both 1887 and 2 Jan 1886 in the article, citing her birth certificate as its source. A girl of her name was registered early in 1886, but nobody with her name was registered in England during the first three months of 1887. I have tried in vain to find her in any UK census, though in the 1939 Register she is recorded as being born in 1886. That's enough to amend her dob in the article to 1886. The uncertainty certainly needs to be mentioned, perhaps briefly in a note. Amitchell125 (talk) 16:46, 30 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
    Amitchell125, I've updated with a note, and focussed on the 1886 date. WormTT(talk) 13:03, 10 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • See here regarding her father's birthplace and occupation, both of which should be included in the section.
    His occupation "Travelling Sales Representative" is in the article, which is a better description of his role than "Commercial Traveller". As for his birthplace, it's not something I'd generally include, but have done so now. WormTT(talk) 08:19, 26 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • Reference 1 (Law) gives other details which should be added, eg, that her parent didn't want her to become an actress.
    I had consciously left that statement out as I hadn't found other evidence of it and had found other small discrepancies in that book, generally don't include that sort of statement unless I'm certain of it. WormTT(talk) 08:19, 26 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
point taken. Amitchell125 (talk) 12:43, 26 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • 'Peckham' - The DNB gives her exact address, this should be added, as well as details on her acing career that are missing from the article, which are imo relevant for this article.
    There's quite a bit of grey area between the roles she was in, different books focus on different roles. However, I'll have a look and see what else can be added WormTT(talk) 08:19, 26 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
The uncertainty surrounding her acting career is, I think, notable. Thanks in advance for taking a look. Amitchell125 (talk) 12:37, 26 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Was there anything particular you wanted to be added? Looking through the list of plays in the ODNb, they're all in the article. I can look in the other books for other roles if that's what you are after... WormTT(talk) 20:45, 11 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Looking again, I think it's fine. Amitchell125 (talk) 21:02, 11 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • Add Pygmalion (linked) as at present only Eliza Doolittle, the name of her part, is given.
Sorted. Amitchell125 (talk) 20:30, 23 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • Reference 3 ('Triumph of Mrs Philipson') - information from the newspaper article needs adding (i.e. the figures of the bye election poll and the size of Philipson's majority (best put as a note in a new section), the reasons for her win cited in the paper, that she left acting to get married, information about 'Havana'). Her first husband was called Stanley in the paper (and in others), so it needs to be written as such in the article (in the Personal life section, presumably).
    I believe all these facts are now in the article (save for Stanley who I'll be covering based on the link you gave below} WormTT(talk) 21:09, 11 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • Reference 5 ('At the Theatres') - "and going on to become an MP" - this is not why she abandoned her acting career (it was to get married), and so should be removed.
    Hadn't read it that way - have removed. WormTT(talk) 11:25, 10 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • The parliamentary recess isn't mentioned by the newspaper in reference 5 (where did this come from?)
    I'm not sure. The run of Beloved Vagabond was in the recess, but the dates don't match for the benefit in the previous year. I've reworded for clarity. WormTT(talk) 11:24, 10 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • link pantomime
    done WormTT(talk) 11:24, 10 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • change to Sir Herbert, not Herbert
  • add that London Pride was in 1916, and that she was a triumph in it.
    Done WormTT(talk) 11:24, 10 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

First section done, rest to follow in due course. Many of the above points are 'quick-fixes' which I can help with. I'll put the article on 'hold' once I've finished my assessment comments - feel free to start work on the above. Amitchell125 (talk) 20:18, 23 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Political career

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  • Reference 2f - as the DNB does not mention any of the information in this sentence (e.g. the Redistribution of Seats Act 1885), the citation here needs to be replaced.
  • Reference 3c - ('Triumph…) - it's worth giving the exact figures of 6142 (bye election majority) and 4579 (Gen. election), as given by the newspaper article.
    Done WormTT(talk) 21:19, 11 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • 3c - ('Triumph…) - as the quote is from The Courier, this publication needs to be mentioned as the source.
    Done WormTT(talk) 21:19, 11 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • Reference 14 - the Act is not mentioned in the factsheet
  • The links within the quote need to be removed, and a note explaining what the limerick is about should be included in the article ([2] explains the quote. The author of the limerick, the otherwise unknown A.E. Halliday, can be found at [3]).
  • Buy one limerick, get one free... The Berwickshire News (Tuesday 14 August 1923) says, 'A Correspondent writes us-

    "Lady Astor — MP for sobriety,
    Mrs Wintringham; She's for propriety,
    Now Berwick-on-Tweed
    With all speed has decreed,
    Mrs Phillipson wins — for Variety"

    Though wearing a different label
    Than her husband — she's proved just as able;
    and as Berwick's M.P.
    Soon we all hope to see
    In the House a "Big Part" — played by Mabel!
Both verses are needed, with a citation (I'll find it). Amitchell125 (talk) 18:57, 25 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
link here, there's a better url, which I'll find it in the library.
Better link? WormTT(talk) 14:14, 10 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
You beat me to it! Amitchell125 (talk) 15:49, 10 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Personal life

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Remaining points

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  • Her name - several newspapers (but not Hansard) refer to her as Mrs.Hilton Philipson, as she was known when not on the stage. This should be noted.
    Noted in lead. Not sure it needs to go elsewhere as her husband is mentioned by name. WormTT(talk) 13:58, 10 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • British Library Newspaper/Newspapers - inconsistent style for citations.
Can you give examples? I've updated quite a few so this may not be an issue any more. WormTT(talk) 13:58, 10 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Apologies, I simply meant that sometimes it says Newspaper and sometimes it says 'Newspapers. It looks fine now. Amitchell125 (talk) 15:54, 10 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Review completed, a few points may be added when I go through once more. Most of the above points can be sorted easily enough, so I've put the article on hold (7 days). Amitchell125 (talk) 06:02, 26 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Amitchell125, brilliant I'll get to these as soon as I can WormTT(talk) 07:12, 26 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]

On hold

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Hello Worm That Turned, I am placing the article  On hold until 13 September 2019, an extension of a week. Please complete any amendments by this date. Regards, Amitchell125 (talk) 12:40, 06 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Amitchell125, Thanks a lot. I'm fully expecting the current case to ease over the weekend, which means I should be freer early next week. WormTT(talk) 12:48, 6 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Best of luck! Amitchell125 (talk) 13:25, 06 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

The article looks great now, and I'm now passing it as a GA. Any remaining minor points we haven't spotted won't stop it being a cracking article, and I really enjoyed reviewing it for you. Amitchell125 (talk) 21:00, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Amitchell125, Thank you - you are an absolute star. I really appreciate your patience on this review - I would have liked to have done things much quicker.
I think there were a couple of other little things that you'd mentioned that I will do my best to put into the article in the near future, but thank you so much for such a thorough review. WormTT(talk) 21:10, 12 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
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