Talk:Holiday (Madonna song)/GA1
GA Review
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GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria
- Is it reasonably well written?
- A. Prose quality:
- Definitely needs some work, see my specific comments below. I'd highly recommend a thorough copyedit, as I'd hate to point out every little detail myself. Misspellings and poor grammar are throughout. A quote in the reception section is completely without quotations for examples, something very obvious that should be fixed without me having to point out.
- Cleaned quite a bit. Please see if I missed anything.
- Definitely needs some work, see my specific comments below. I'd highly recommend a thorough copyedit, as I'd hate to point out every little detail myself. Misspellings and poor grammar are throughout. A quote in the reception section is completely without quotations for examples, something very obvious that should be fixed without me having to point out.
- B. MoS compliance:
- Some off wikilinking going on in the Credits section. I don't think you need to link any of those instruments. Also avoid putting citations in the middle of a sentence.
- Removed.
- Some off wikilinking going on in the Credits section. I don't think you need to link any of those instruments. Also avoid putting citations in the middle of a sentence.
- A. Prose quality:
- Is it factually accurate and verifiable?
- A. References to sources:
- B. Citation of reliable sources where necessary:
- Ref #69 needs to be replaced. Discogs isn't WP:RS.
- You meant #68. Well couldnot find any other RS hence removed.
- Ref #69 needs to be replaced. Discogs isn't WP:RS.
- C. No original research:
- "The song starts in a chord sequence reminiscent of the Cyndi Lauper song "Time After Time"." says who? This is not a fact,but an opinion, so either point out whose opinion it is or remove it.
- The authorname was present at the end, placed it at the beginning.
- "The song starts in a chord sequence reminiscent of the Cyndi Lauper song "Time After Time"." says who? This is not a fact,but an opinion, so either point out whose opinion it is or remove it.
- A. References to sources:
- Is it broad in its coverage?
- A. Major aspects:
- B. Focused:
- The live performances section is huge compared to everything else. Is it really super important what the dancers were wearing? Or how Madonna wore her hair? This is fancruft. Trim down the section to stuff that actually relates to the song.
- I reduced as much as I could. However for some places it is really necessary to describe the attire, like the ponytail hair or the cone bra. These kind of attires from the live performance became an image and representation of Madonna. I have briefed it as much as I could.
- The live performances section is huge compared to everything else. Is it really super important what the dancers were wearing? Or how Madonna wore her hair? This is fancruft. Trim down the section to stuff that actually relates to the song.
- A. Major aspects:
- Is it neutral?
- Fair representation without bias:
- The issue of critical reception creeping into the lead as fact is a problem. Also the entire reception section is very positive.
- I couldnot find any negative info.
- The issue of critical reception creeping into the lead as fact is a problem. Also the entire reception section is very positive.
- Fair representation without bias:
- Is it stable?
- No edit wars, etc:
- No edit wars, etc:
- Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
- A. Images are copyright tagged, and non-free images have fair use rationales:
- File:Madonna-2ndholiday-cover.jpg is too large; fair-use images need to be below 300px.
- Done.
- File:Madonna-2ndholiday-cover.jpg is too large; fair-use images need to be below 300px.
- B. Images are provided where possible and appropriate, with suitable captions:
- A. Images are copyright tagged, and non-free images have fair use rationales:
- Overall:
- Pass or Fail:
- On hold for now. Prose needs a ton of work. The rest of the stuff I've mentioned above shouldn't be too much trouble to fix, I hope. Message me when you feel you've had a chance to address my comments and a copyedit has been done. Drewcifer (talk) 12:17, 20 August 2009 (UTC)
- Adressed. --Legolas (talk2me) 05:53, 21 August 2009 (UTC)
- On hold for now. Prose needs a ton of work. The rest of the stuff I've mentioned above shouldn't be too much trouble to fix, I hope. Message me when you feel you've had a chance to address my comments and a copyedit has been done. Drewcifer (talk) 12:17, 20 August 2009 (UTC)
- Pass or Fail:
Prose comments:
- ""Holiday" is the song by American" THE song?
- "while talking about universal sentiment" THE universal sentiment.
- "one of the most live-performed songs by Madonna" awkward.
- "It appeared in most of her tours including the second leg of her 2008-09 Sticky & Sweet Tour." It HAS appeared. 2008–2009. Why mention Sticky Sweet Tour? Is that one more notable than the rest (in relation to this song)?
- "green signalled" I think you mean green-lit. Signaled is spelled wrong anyways.
- "It was Jellybean" refer to people by their last names, in most cases, not their nicknames.
- The Background section has alot of short abrupt sentences. Try and combine a few of them.
- The background section covers alot, but it's one big paragraph. Break it up a bit.
- "I was designed by Jean-Paul Gaultier." IT Drewcifer (talk) 12:17, 20 August 2009 (UTC)