Talk:Enter the Dominatrix/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Red Phoenix (talk · contribs) 02:02, 3 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]

What the heck, I feel like being nice and doing a review. Also, the title's kind of catchy... seems to be an interesting subject. Red Phoenix ^{let's talk...} 02:02, 3 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Notes

Czar, as always you do fantastic work. There's not a lot for me to point out in this short article, but I will nitpick just a little bit:

"The pack introduces new weapons such as a heavy minigun, a flamethrower, a grenade launcher, new vehicles, and new computer-controlled support characters (homies)." Honestly, when I first read it, I thought the last bit was vandalism. I think a rewording to clarify that the computer controlled support characters are called "homies" by the game is needed.
Is there a reason "player-character" is hyphenated? I'm unfamiliar with this particular wording.
"and scheduled for the 2013." Please reword, remove "the"
"The game received "mixed or average reviews", according to video game review score aggregator Metacritic." In the lead, Enter the Dominatrix is referred to as a downloadable content pack for the video game Saints Row IV. This introduces some ambiguity; is it Saints Row IV or just Enter the Dominatrix that received mixed or average reviews?
Is there any reason specifically Metacritic and the EGM reviewer are mentioned in the lead? There's only one or two more reviewers, why highlight these two? It seems awkward for the lead.

I think that's about all I've got. Nicely done. Red Phoenix ^{let's talk...} 02:29, 3 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]

@Red Phoenix, appreciate the compliment and good points. Think I got all of them—take a look? (As for "player-character", I prefer the hyphen since it makes the oneness of the player and the character more explicit. And I stumble when I see it without a hyphen or wikilink. I also think it's the more progressive stance. IAR, right? ...I change it whenever anyone calls it out.) czar ♔ 09:15, 3 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]

All right, looks solid. I'm good with ("homies") as being a bit more explanatory, and I'm okay with "player-character" given that explanation. Looks like everything's in line to pass. Well done. Red Phoenix ^{let's talk...} 02:38, 4 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]