Talk:Emeric, King of Hungary/GA1
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Reviewer: Wizardman (talk · contribs) 00:34, 11 January 2015 (UTC)
I'll review this article shortly. Wizardman 00:34, 11 January 2015 (UTC)
- Wizardman, thank you for your review. Please find my comments below. Borsoka (talk) 04:06, 11 January 2015 (UTC)
Here are the issues I found:
- Link suzerainity and appanage.
- Links added. Borsoka (talk) 04:06, 11 January 2015 (UTC)
- Putting something about his appointing his son king in the lead would be helpful, since I just presumed he was king when he died given the years or his reign.
- Information added. Borsoka (talk) 04:06, 11 January 2015 (UTC)
- "Emeric succeeded his father, who died on 23 April 1196, without opposition" while that may be true, noting the lack of opposition feels odd given that the rest of the section noted the fighting with his brother throughout. I'd either remove the without opposition part or make that clearer as to who that meant.
- I opted for deleting the text. Borsoka (talk) 04:06, 11 January 2015 (UTC)
- "which eventually became part of the Coat of arms of Hungary in 1202." rewording 1202 to that year would be nice, since you note the year in the prior sentence. Either that or change "In the summer of 1202, Enrico Dandolo, Doge of Venice," to "That summer, Enrico..."
- Text changed. Borsoka (talk) 04:06, 11 January 2015 (UTC)
- Is there a reason "on 30 November" is in quotes?
- Quotes deleted. Borsoka (talk) 04:06, 11 January 2015 (UTC)
I'll put the article on hold and will pass when the issues are fixed. Wizardman 03:08, 11 January 2015 (UTC)
- Thank you again for your suggestions. Please let me know if further modifications are needed. Borsoka (talk) 04:06, 11 January 2015 (UTC)
Everything looks good now, so I'll pass the article. Wizardman 04:14, 11 January 2015 (UTC)