Talk:Diasporic Vietnamese narratives
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Hi Kathy, Will suggested that I might just offer input whether or not you are done with your editing. I hope you won't mind. This is Laura Hoopes (LLMHoopes). I am going to read the article now and see what I may be able to suggest. LH
Hi,
Yes, that's absolutely fine. I very much appreciate any feedback. It's a very rough draft; I won't be able to edit it until next week because of fall semester. I will hopefully finish it by the 27th.
Typing.nguyen (talk) 21:02, 21 August 2018 (UTC)
__Here are some notes on the page as it now is. I hope some of this can prove useful to you. Article is interesting and written at an accessible level.
Long overview with several paragraphs. I’d like it to be much more succinct, maybe by using only the first and last paragraphs which are more general views and saving the details for the sections below.
Headings: for each heading, highlight it and click on Paragraph and select the size of heading you want so the article will have consistent heading format.
Need to entitle the references “References”
Balance: History is much the longest section, others equivalent per the outline are very brief, lists or several sentences. Maybe nothing can be done about the differences, though. I think I’d consider making the causes into paragraph form instead of a bulleted list. Cheers, Laura Hoopes LLMHoopesLLMHoopes (talk) 00:46, 22 August 2018 (UTC)
Thanks for your review. The only sections I've edited were the Overview and parts of the History; I haven't added/deleted the Information Age subsection. I was going to delete the bulleted list - that was from the original contributor - since it seems redundant. I think my biggest problem is that I have so much information, ironically, and it's difficult to condense since we're now living in the information age.
I'm also glad my writing for this entry is accessible. I've been told I'm too abstract when I write, so this is a relief.
Thanks again! Typing.nguyen (talk) 01:16, 22 August 2018 (UTC)
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