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Talk:Contrail (song)/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: Carbrera (talk · contribs) 17:23, 5 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]


Infobox

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  • The alt is just fine, but I would replace "buildings" with "skyscrapers"
  • Shouldn't the previous single's entry be called "Big Boys Cry"/"Beautiful" ?

Lead

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Paragraph 1

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  • De-capitalize the 'b' in 'Bilingual'

Paragraph 2

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  • Capitalize the 't' in 'Feel tour'
  • Capitalize the 't' in 'Live Style tour'

Background and release

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Paragraph 1

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  • Can you read over the first sentence's structure: "In March 2013, a corresponding team working Japanese network Tokyo Broadcasting System (TBS) approach Amuro and asked her to work with them by recording a theme song for their 2013 television series Flying Public Relations Office, which she accepted.[1]"?? It contains a lot of information and a different tense within it
  • Link "New York City, New York"

Paragraph 2

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  • De-capitalize the 'b' in 'Bilingual'

Composition

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Paragraph 1

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  • Remove the apostrophe in "staff member's" please
  • Change the semi-colon at the end of the paragraph to a full colon please (:)

Paragraph 2

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  • Add "the" before "majority of the recordings on Feel felt "better in English", and that the theme song for the television series was directed towards Japanese audiences only." please

Critical response

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  • Add "highly" before "positive reviews from most music critics." please
  • Remove the apostrophe in "editor's" please
  • I would move David Cirone's review to the end of this section since it's the only mixed review in the bunch

Commercial performance

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  • Add a source proving the Oricon Singles Chart's rules on digital sales please
  • Rest is excellent

Music video

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Paragraph 1

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  • Take "upside down" out since you mention "from the ground" later in the statement
  • Change "birds eye" to "birds-eye" please
  • Remove "and" in "and a couple who have just finished surfing" please

Paragraph 2

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  • "down town" --> "downtown"
  • "Amruo" --> "Amuro"
  • Remove ", Los Angeles," please

Live performances

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  • Please change "Live Style concert tour in Japan" to "Live Style Tour in Japan"

Track listing

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  • This is just a matter of preference, but since only one version of the track is available, you could use the 'track listing' format box, as used on articles like Make Me Like You and Used to Love You.

End of GA Review:

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Fantastic article as usual; on hold for seven days. Good luck!!! Carbrera (talk) 00:09, 6 June 2016 (UTC).[reply]

@Carbrera: Done and dusted CaliforniaDreamsFan (talk · contribs} 01:21, 6 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]