Talk:Chōkaisan Ōmonoimi Shrine

	This article was reviewed by member(s) of WikiProject Articles for creation. The project works to allow users to contribute quality articles and media files to the encyclopedia and track their progress as they are developed. To participate, please visit the project page for more information.Articles for creationWikipedia:WikiProject Articles for creationTemplate:WikiProject Articles for creationAfC articles
	This article was accepted from this draft on 12 November 2023 by reviewer Turnagra (talk · contribs).

Japan: Shinto

This article is within the scope of WikiProject Japan, a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of Japan-related articles on Wikipedia. If you would like to participate, please visit the project page, where you can join the project, participate in relevant discussions, and see lists of open tasks. Current time in Japan: 15:57, November 12, 2024 (JST, Reiwa 6) (Refresh)JapanWikipedia:WikiProject JapanTemplate:WikiProject JapanJapan-related articles

???

This article has not yet received a rating on the project's importance scale.

This article is supported by the Shinto task force.

WikiProject Japan to do list:

Peer review: None
A-class review: None

Featured content candidates –

Articles: None
Pictures: None
Lists: None

Good article nominations: Vinland Saga (TV series), Godzilla Minus One
Add requested images to articles that need them.
Pages for Deletion: Participate in Japan-related deletion discussions.
Improve and expand Japan-related stubs.
Create some requested articles.
Help translate an article from the Japanese Wikipedia into English.
Assess unassessed articles

Architecture

	Architecture portal This article is within the scope of WikiProject Architecture, a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of Architecture on Wikipedia. If you would like to participate, please visit the project page, where you can join the discussion and see a list of open tasks.ArchitectureWikipedia:WikiProject ArchitectureTemplate:WikiProject ArchitectureArchitecture articles
???	This article has not yet received a rating on the project's importance scale.

Religion

	Religion portal This article is within the scope of WikiProject Religion, a project to improve Wikipedia's articles on Religion-related subjects. Please participate by editing the article, and help us assess and improve articles to good and 1.0 standards, or visit the wikiproject page for more details.ReligionWikipedia:WikiProject ReligionTemplate:WikiProject ReligionReligion articles
???	This article has not yet received a rating on the project's importance scale.

Religious Buildings, Architecture and Monasticism (inactive)

This article is within the scope of WikiProject Religious Buildings, Architecture and Monasticism, a project which is currently considered to be inactive.Religious Buildings, Architecture and MonasticismWikipedia:WikiProject Religious Buildings, Architecture and MonasticismTemplate:WikiProject Religious Buildings, Architecture and MonasticismReligious Buildings, Architecture and Monasticism articles

Article prose

@Immanuelle I thought it would be better to comment here rather than in the AfC comments. I think it still needs a bit of work, I'm afraid. My main issue with the prose is that you've got a lot of standalone, single sentence paragraphs which make the article feel more like a list of bullet points than an actual article. What I'd suggest would be to check out the articles of other, more famous shrines or temples to get a feel for what sort of stuff they cover, and how they do so - for example, Kiyomizu-dera or Itsukushima Shrine. Turnagra (talk) 07:52, 11 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Turnagra sorry for tagging you a bit too soon but I organized it just a bit more in a way that I think made my initial intentions a bit clearer. Do you see it as an improvement? Immanuelle ❤️💚💙 (talk to the cutest Wikipedian) 07:59, 11 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Immanuelle it's definitely improving, but I think there is still a wee way to go yet. Turnagra (talk) 08:09, 11 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Turnagra I think I managed to figure out what you wanted. A bit of a harder writing style but it is a lot more pleasant to read now I think. Immanuelle ❤️💚💙 (talk to the cutest Wikipedian) 08:47, 11 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Turnagra did you get to read it yet? Immanuelle ❤️💚💙 (talk to the cutest Wikipedian) 21:49, 11 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Immanuelle Sorry, your last ping was just after I'd logged off for the night. What you've got now is absolutely a massive improvement and it's looking a lot better, good job! I think the article could still do with some further explanation for people unfamiliar with the shrine and shintoism. For example:

What does it mean that Omonoimi no Kami ranks up?
What was the outcome of the legal dispute after WW2?
What is the Hi-awase shinji festival? You've got a bit about it but I'd love to know more.
Do the history of the sub-shrines differ from the history of the shrine as a whole? It could be good to get some expansion of their respective histories and anything interesting about them.

These aren't necessarily required for the article to be accepted but would be a huge help to the overall quality of the article. What it would need still is I think some more work on the copy and a solid proof - make sure things roughly make sense and flow nicely, and any typos are picked up. Turnagra (talk) 23:14, 11 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Turnagra I tried fixing some of it. I definitely managed to expand on the ranking up and the festival, but I'm not actually sure what the outcome of the legal dispute was. As for the local histories likewise research is a bit hard on it. I think I reached my limit on those two things and will need a Japanese speaking collaborator for more info on those two things. Anything else you think could be improved? Immanuelle ❤️💚💙 (talk to the cutest Wikipedian) 23:48, 11 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks, it's definitely shaping up well - I've made a few edits to the lede as well to try a bit more. My last thing at this stage is that I'm still a bit iffy about some of the sources, particularly what are now sources 5 and 6. What makes these reliable? Turnagra (talk) 01:18, 12 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Turnagra I believe the person who wrote 5 has an educational certification from the Association of Shinto Shrines but I will have to do a bit more digging to be 100% sure on that. I hope to get back to you tomorrow confident on it

As for 6 it is more questionable and I might want to get better sources for the claims.

I can confidently say I do not consider 5 to be a tourist site but 6 seems to be one. Immanuelle ❤️💚💙 (talk to the cutest Wikipedian) 07:06, 12 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Turnagra the creator of the website has this certification https://www.jinjakentei.jp/kenteitoha.html first-class Shinto shrine certification (神社検定壱級, Jinja Kentei Ikkkyū) which has involvement from Kokugakuin University and Kogakkan University. But I am unsure about what the nature of the certification is, although they appear to be some kind of lecturer now. Immanuelle ❤️💚💙 (talk to the cutest Wikipedian) 19:04, 12 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]