Talk:Blood and Black Lace/GA1

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Gerald Waldo Luis (talk · contribs) 14:27, 23 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

So... I will be reviewing this article. Gerald WL 14:27, 23 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Lead and infobox

Add alt text to the film poster? Gerald WL 14:58, 23 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done! PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
In the prose, the Italian title is "6 donne per l'assassino," but the poster says "Sei donne per l'assassino." Mind addressing? Also I suggest adding a native name module in the infobox. Gerald WL 14:58, 23 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Later in the prose, it is specified that the onscreen title uses 6, while some of the promotional materials use Sei. I can make the changes you've also suggested. PatTheMoron (talk) 00:36, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Link principal photography and Rome? Gerald WL 14:58, 23 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done! PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Link popular fiction? Gerald WL 14:58, 23 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done! PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Plot

"That night, Nicole drives to an antique store to supply to Franco Scalo, the store's owner and her lover, with cocaine." Wa-wa-wa-wait... so Nicole goes to an antique store to "supply"... cocaine? What do you mean by "supply" and how is "cocaine" in an antique store... Gerald WL 10:10, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Yeah, it does seem abrupt, but it is established earlier in the film that Franco (the antique dealer and Nicole's boyfriend) is a coke user, and that she joins in on his addition. She's visiting him to give him some more of the stuff... could the sentence be worded better, or should the context be put a bit earlier in the summary? PatTheMoron (talk) 12:52, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  PatTheMoron, if I'm reading it right, Franco is the coke user and not the antique store selling cocaine or stuff like that. Now I can see how I got confused. Is the fact that Nicole "drives to the store" important? If no, I suggest just saying that Nicole meets Franco to supply him with cocaine. Gerald WL 15:52, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  - In the film, the killer uses Nicole's car as a getaway vehicle (after triggering its car alarm) and then abandons it - it comes up as a key bit of evidence in the film, but since it isn't really necessary to state in the summary, I could remove it. PatTheMoron (talk) 22:21, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
    PatTheMoron, I dived deep into this by borrowing an DVD of this from a friend of mine and watch it myself. I can't really understand the movie due to its fast dialogue, but I see that the investigation on the car alarm does no contribution further to the story. It's seemingly just an aspect of the investigation. I'm sure you understand the movie than I do, so you know what's important and what's not. Gerald WL 07:54, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
    - If you take a look at the current version, I've removed all references to the car, and expanded a little on Scalo's character in a manner that hopefully reads clearer than the earlier version. And I hope you enjoyed the movie, it's one of my personal favourites! PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
      PatTheMoron, re-read it, seem to flow it well now. The first Italian movie, and I'm impressed. Not on my grand list, but can see how it contributes to the thriller genre. Peggy reminds me of myself when I was a crybaby kid. My favorite moment is when the film ends with the text "FINE." I thought, Okay? Gerald WL 15:14, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Cast

Link Arrow Video and Blu-ray? Gerald WL 16:57, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done! PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Background and style

Link West Germany? Gerald WL 10:23, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done! PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
"...a film genre called krimis, murder mystery films inspired by the works of Edgar Wallace, became popular in the early 1960s, with the first being 1959's Der Frosch mit der Maske (transl. The Frog with the Mask)." Suggest bracketing "murder mystery films inspired by the works of Edgar Wallace" instead of comma-ing it, as there's too much commas in the sentence. Just doesn't flow well IMO. Gerald WL 10:23, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done! PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Link Italian cinema? Gerald WL 10:23, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done! PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
"1959's Der Frosch mit der Maske (transl. The Frog with the Mask)" Suggest putting single apostrophe (') in The Frog with the Mask. Similar to other "transl"-s throughout the article. Gerald WL 16:57, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Link eroticism? Gerald WL 16:57, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done! PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Pre-production

Reiner and Dantes were late additions to the cast, as they took over roles initially intended for Gustavo De Nardo and Yoko Tani respectively." Suggest adding comma, to be "...for Gustavo De Nardo and Yoko Tani, respectively." Gerald WL 16:57, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done! PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
"they would be paid in full at the end of production but never received their salaries." Suggest adding comma, to be "...at the end of the production, but never received their salaries." Gerald WL 16:57, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done! PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Production

Suggest changing subsection name to "Filming". Gerald WL 16:57, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done! PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
"When actors asked to do fight scenes"-- maybe "When actors were asked to do fight scenes"? Gerald WL 16:57, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Changed the wording so it's clearer that it was the actors themselves requesting to do those scenes. PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wtf so tragic lol. Gerald WL 16:57, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Contemporary

""Whit." of Variety"-- why in quotations? Gerald WL 17:04, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- I think it's an alias. PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Yeah early Variety reviews usually credit people whit names that aren't full names. From my work, they are credited from short forms of their full names but that's pure speculation. Names are often things like "Lor." or "Whit.". As it's not clear if these are real people ore pseudonymn's or what, I've left them as they are credited. Andrzejbanas (talk) 13:29, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Retrospective

"voted number 85 on "The 100 Scariest Movie Moments""-- should it be italicized instead of being quoted? Gerald WL 17:04, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done! PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Legacy

Link masturbation? Gerald WL 17:04, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done! PatTheMoron (talk) 12:27, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  And that's all I have to comment about its legacy.^[FBDB] Gerald WL 15:18, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Citations

All citations are good, I rescued some of them to disclaim. One thing I'll note is that there are some citations placed at the same place, i.e. "Marriage is the reason of divorce.[1][2]" I don't mind such, but if there's a way to relocate the citations after what they specifically talked, and if it is space-efficient, I recommend relocating. This is only valid if, as I said, it doesn't take vague bytes. Gerald WL 10:23, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

I've tried to go through this, and clean it up in some sections. The only one that remains is the one talking about Quentin Tarantino's home video label, but that sentence is so short, I think it's better to have them all at the end, otherwise, it's like we are hiccuping citaitons between every third or fourth word. :) Andrzejbanas (talk) 13:56, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

LOTS of repetitive citations, i.e. "Momma can't eat chocolate.[1] Oh and strawberries.[1]" Please remove the early mentions of the citations, i.e. "Momma can't eat chocolate. Oh and stawberries.[1]" Gerald WL 11:05, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

I've gone through and cleaned these up. Is it acceptable now @Gerald Waldo Luis:? :) Andrzejbanas (talk) 13:56, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

For "Hafidason, Almar", should it be BBC Online? Gerald WL 17:04, 24 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

The site itself just says BBC, and I don't see a mention of it being called BBC Online on that site, so I've left it as BBC. I don't think it's too serious of a deal but am happy to change it to either if someone could clarify that. Andrzejbanas (talk) 13:35, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Andrzejbanas, that reference supports the claim on BBC Online's review about the film, so I thought it should be BBC Online in the cite too. Feel free either tho, I think they're both the same, so. Gerald WL 15:16, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Overall

I think it has passed the GA criteria. I did an archive of sources days ago, but it doesn't archive all sources: R1, R58; S1, S4, S5. Mind archiving them? Gerald WL 15:22, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for doing the archiveURLs. I believe i've gone through the rest now @Gerald Waldo Luis: ! :) Andrzejbanas (talk) 15:55, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Andrzejbanas, "Hafidason, Almar" has not. Just that one left. Gerald WL 15:57, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Good eye! Done now. Andrzejbanas (talk) 16:05, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Andrzejbanas, and it's fully passed from there. Gerald WL 16:54, 25 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Good Article review progress box

Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()

3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()

Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.