Talk:Ario Pardee

Ario Pardee has been listed as one of the Social sciences and society good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it.
Review: March 17, 2019. (Reviewed version).

A fact from Ario Pardee appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 19 April 2019 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:

Did you know... that Ario Pardee's gift of $20,000 to Lafayette College in 1864 was the largest sum ever given to an educational institution in Pennsylvania at the time?

A record of the entry may be seen at Wikipedia:Recent additions/2019/April. The nomination discussion and review may be seen at Template:Did you know nominations/Ario Pardee.

Wikipedia

Biography

This article is within the scope of WikiProject Biography, a collaborative effort to create, develop and organize Wikipedia's articles about people. All interested editors are invited to join the project and contribute to the discussion. For instructions on how to use this banner, please refer to the documentation.BiographyWikipedia:WikiProject BiographyTemplate:WikiProject Biographybiography articles

Pennsylvania Low‑importance

	Pennsylvania portal This article is within the scope of WikiProject Pennsylvania, a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of Pennsylvania on Wikipedia. If you would like to participate, please visit the project page, where you can join the discussion and see a list of open tasks.PennsylvaniaWikipedia:WikiProject PennsylvaniaTemplate:WikiProject PennsylvaniaPennsylvania articles
Low	This article has been rated as Low-importance on the project's importance scale.

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Ario Pardee/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Canada Hky (talk · contribs) 18:03, 14 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Hello! I am happy to take a shot at reviewing this article for GA status. I typically do a read through, post any thoughts / comments / suggestions and then after that is complete, go through the checklist criteria. I look forward to helping improve this article. Canada Hky (talk) 18:03, 14 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]

General comments

The lead is a bit short for an article of this length. I would suggest at least one sentence to cover each of the subsections in the article itself.

Let me know what you think of the new lead

Is there an appropriate wikilink for "rodman" (or possibly "surveyor").

I struggled with this initially, I've added a wlink to surveying to show what field it is in.

There are several sentences with multiple commas that are bordering on run-on. These may be better broken up, or reqorked for smoother punctuation. Examples: "After a brief trip to Michigan, where his parents had relocated to, Pardee settled down in Hazleton, Pennsylvania and signed on with the Hazleton Railroad and Coal Company as a superintendent" and "The building was burned down again, in an act of arson, in 1897, but was again rebuilt by 1899".

Fixed both of these (second one didn't need the commas after all)

Pictures all look good. Appropriately licensed and placed in the article. ALT Text may be helpful.
In the body of the article, there is no mention of the "founding father of Hazleton".

Good spot, I've changed it to more accurately reflect the sources.

No copyvios found from the sources I could find online.
No disambiguation links that need to be fixed.
The wording in the last section about the children is a bit confusing. What is the birth order of the 9 children (if it is known)? The wording about the deceased twin makes it seem like Israel would be the youngest?

Let me know if you think this wording is any better.

Is Elizabeth's year of death known?

Another good catch, added.

"Within months he fell in love with her, and they later married" - this is not really encyclopedic wording, can it be tightened up? Y

Those are my initial thoughts. This was an enjoyable article to read, and I think it only needs minor tweaks to pass. I am happy to discuss any of these. Canada Hky (talk) 18:56, 14 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]

@Canada Hky: thanks for reviewing this! I'll go through this over the weekend, if not sooner. Catching me at a busy time in real life, but upon quickly reviewing that list I should be able to fix most of them rather easily. Appreciate your support. SEMMENDINGER (talk) 20:37, 14 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]

@Canada Hky: Found some free time during lunch to take another look over this. I think I've made all the appropriate changes! SEMMENDINGER (talk) 16:35, 15 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Specific criteria reviewed

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not) Thank you very much for taking the time to address all my comments. I made one minor tweak to the lead, but i think this article now meets GA criteria.

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
The prose is clear and easy to understand.
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism):
No issues with this criteria.
It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects): b (focused):
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.:
It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/Fail: - thank you very much for your nomination and your time in helping to improve based on my suggestions. Canada Hky (talk) 13:18, 17 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]