Talk:A. A. Adams/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Sammielh (talk · contribs) 14:27, 2 August 2023 (UTC)[reply]

I'll pick up this review. Comments below. Sammielh (talk) 14:27, 2 August 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Good Article review progress box

Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()

3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()

Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

Lead and infobox

I would be inclined to expand the lead slightly – perhaps add in his political party and a sentence about his chiropractic career
The references shouldn't be needed in the lead
I don't see where the body specifically says that he supported gun control; you might need to amend the dangerous weapons section to make this clearer
There seems to be some confusion in the infobox on his districts – per source [1], he represented the 26th district from 1969 to 1973, alongside Thomas A. Swayze Jr., preceded by Homer Humiston and succeeded by Clifford W. Beck; he represented the 27th district from 1973 to 1981, alongside R. Lorraine Wojahn and James E. Salatino, preceded by Frank Marzano and succeeded by Art Wang

Early life, career, personal life

WP:GEOCOMMA is missing after Washington in Bellingham, Washington,
(Optional) Might be worth putting that Palmer College is in Davenport, Iowa as I assumed it would be in Washington
I can't see where the source gives his full date of birth
I would be inclined to specify he moved to Tacoma, Washington,
This isn't a requirement for GA but as a note, there appears to be some details in the sources which might be beneficial in the article: source [4] indicates that he graduated from university in 1924 and gives more detail about his service with the Washington Chiropractors Association (check spelling in the article)
I would make the entire chiropractic section one paragraph, it breaks strangely in two paragraphs
Link Democrat
I believe all of the election results (e.g. 52-48) should have an en dash instead of a hyphen
Is there any detail about why the dangerous weapons bill was originally contested?
There should be a comma after "In 1972"
I would link redistricting
I don't see where the sources specifically say that he moved to the 27th district because of redistricting
"he won election for his fifth term"
I would avoid starting three paragraphs with "In [year]"
"He supported decriminalization again" I would specify of marijuana
Marijuana legalization is linked in the lead but not the body
There is discrepancy between cosponsor and co-sponsor
I don't see where the source says that the state lottery bill did not pass
I would avoid using GOP in the last paragraph of career as this may not be a term understood by international readers without any explanation
Capitalise Republican
"Mildred S. Adams (1899–1993)"
The personal life section doesn't flow very well but I'm not sure how well that can be amended
Is there a reason only one election is in the electoral history section?

General

Earwig came back clear and I wasn't able to find any close paraphrasing or source issues other than that noted above from spot checks
There are no image issues although I would change the link on the Commons page to point to the image itself

ThadeusOfNazereth comments

Logging that I have seen this and will try and get these implemented this week, but I'm in the middle of a major cross-country move so it might be later. Thank you for the detailed feedback! ThadeusOfNazereth(he/him)^{Talk to Me!} 15:55, 2 August 2023 (UTC)[reply]
@Sammielh: Thank you again! I believe I've implemented all of those fixes. On the personal life section, I agree that it doesn't flow well but I also agree that there's nothing really to be done about it. I tried to keep it to only the most relevant items. On the electoral history point, I included the first election because it seemed the most notable. The problem with those boxes is that they stack on top of each other, so if I were to include all of them the page would get really long vertically. ThadeusOfNazereth(he/him)^{Talk to Me!} 02:14, 3 August 2023 (UTC)[reply]
- @ThadeusOfNazereth: This looks good. I've made one small edit to the article but otherwise I'm happy to promote this to GA. Good work on this article! Sammielh (talk) 11:13, 4 August 2023 (UTC)[reply]