Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates/Pitta/archive1
Blurb review
[edit]Any comments or changes for this suggested TFA blurb? - Dank (push to talk) 07:05, 17 February 2019 (UTC)
Pittas (Pittidae) are a family of birds found in Asia, Australasia and Africa. There are around 40 to 42 species in 3 genera, Pitta, Erythropitta and Hydrornis, all similar in general appearance and habits. They are Old World suboscines, closely related to the broadbills. Pittas are medium-sized by passerine standards, at 15 to 25 cm (5.9–9.8 in) in length, and stocky, with strong, longish legs and long feet. They have very short tails and stout, slightly decurved bills. Many have brightly coloured plumage. Most pitta species are tropical, although a few species can be found in temperate climates. They are mostly found in forests, but some live in scrub and mangroves. They usually forage alone on wet forest floors in areas with good ground cover. They eat earthworms, snails, insects and similar invertebrate prey, as well as small vertebrates. The main threat to pittas is habitat loss in the form of rapid deforestation; they are also targeted by the cage-bird trade. (Full article...)
- Reading the blurb I was going to comment that it made no real mention of the relationship of the pittas to other birds, but that made me realise that I never put that in the lead of the article! I'll fix that soon, but my only comment is that by removing the passerine from the lead sentence and leaving its introduction to the line about size, it sort of, I dunno, decontextualizes the term if you aren't overly familiar with it. I'd recommend reinserting it before the word bird on the first line. Beyond that, all good. Sabine's Sunbird talk 07:40, 17 February 2019 (UTC)
- Passerines are over 6400 species of the roughly 10k bird species, is that right? Wehwalt is scheduling March as we speak, I need to go deal with that. Jim is travelling ... Jim, when you get back, do you have any ideas about where to insert "passerine"? - Dank (push to talk) 15:00, 17 February 2019 (UTC)
- Dank, not gone yet! If I were writing a bird article I'd put family of passerine birds..., seems a more natural placement. I don't know if that creates a problem with "medium-sized", personally I'd be happy with Pittas are medium-sized at..., but other readers may think differently, in which case you'd need to go straight to the dimensions. @Sabine's Sunbird: Jimfbleak - talk to me? 15:12, 17 February 2019 (UTC)
- Thanks Jim, and thanks Sabine for bringing it up. Today and tomorrow, I have to work on the March blurbs. I'll be back. - Dank (push to talk) 15:19, 17 February 2019 (UTC)
- I can see putting "passerine" in the first sentence in an article, but blurbs are different, in several ways. (This is just my opinion, and the point of this exercise is to vet the blurbs ... so feel free to disagree.) Almost every bird we run is passerine; do we really want to use the same word near the start of almost every bird blurb? Also, most of our readers will generally assume a bird is a perching bird if they aren't told otherwise (that is, the word "bird" doesn't immediately conjure up an ostrich or stork for most people ... and it will be obvious from the image, too). Do we really need to be in a rush to give readers this information? I have no objection to "passerine" or "perching bird" in the blurb, but the first sentence doesn't feel like the right place for it, to me. - Dank (push to talk) 00:52, 18 February 2019 (UTC)
- If you think so. My only other question is now that I've stuck a line in about the suboscines and broadbills whether you want to include a line like The pittas are Old World suboscines, and are closely related to the broadbills. Sabine's Sunbird talk 16:50, 18 February 2019 (UTC)
- I added it in the third sentence ... does that look right? - Dank (push to talk) 16:56, 18 February 2019 (UTC)
- Good to go. Sabine's Sunbird talk 16:59, 18 February 2019 (UTC)
- I added it in the third sentence ... does that look right? - Dank (push to talk) 16:56, 18 February 2019 (UTC)
- If you think so. My only other question is now that I've stuck a line in about the suboscines and broadbills whether you want to include a line like The pittas are Old World suboscines, and are closely related to the broadbills. Sabine's Sunbird talk 16:50, 18 February 2019 (UTC)
- I can see putting "passerine" in the first sentence in an article, but blurbs are different, in several ways. (This is just my opinion, and the point of this exercise is to vet the blurbs ... so feel free to disagree.) Almost every bird we run is passerine; do we really want to use the same word near the start of almost every bird blurb? Also, most of our readers will generally assume a bird is a perching bird if they aren't told otherwise (that is, the word "bird" doesn't immediately conjure up an ostrich or stork for most people ... and it will be obvious from the image, too). Do we really need to be in a rush to give readers this information? I have no objection to "passerine" or "perching bird" in the blurb, but the first sentence doesn't feel like the right place for it, to me. - Dank (push to talk) 00:52, 18 February 2019 (UTC)
- Thanks Jim, and thanks Sabine for bringing it up. Today and tomorrow, I have to work on the March blurbs. I'll be back. - Dank (push to talk) 15:19, 17 February 2019 (UTC)
- Dank, not gone yet! If I were writing a bird article I'd put family of passerine birds..., seems a more natural placement. I don't know if that creates a problem with "medium-sized", personally I'd be happy with Pittas are medium-sized at..., but other readers may think differently, in which case you'd need to go straight to the dimensions. @Sabine's Sunbird: Jimfbleak - talk to me? 15:12, 17 February 2019 (UTC)
- Reading the blurb I was going to comment that it made no real mention of the relationship of the pittas to other birds, but that made me realise that I never put that in the lead of the article! I'll fix that soon, but my only comment is that by removing the passerine from the lead sentence and leaving its introduction to the line about size, it sort of, I dunno, decontextualizes the term if you aren't overly familiar with it. I'd recommend reinserting it before the word bird on the first line. Beyond that, all good. Sabine's Sunbird talk 07:40, 17 February 2019 (UTC)