Wikipedia:WikiProject Video games/Peer review/Half-Life 2: Episode One
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Valve's first journey into episodic gaming and the first expansion for HL2. Now exorcised of any cruft, I was hoping to progress this article to GA status and (hopefully) FA before Half-Life 2: Episode Two is released. Looking for any critiques and suggestions to help improve the article further. The article isn't that long, but I think it's as long as it can be without it being padded out - but I could be wrong. Thanks in advance for all help. - Qjuad 15:04, 1 May 2007 (UTC)
- I see some print references with external links on the titles that lead to the home page of the magazine. Unless there is an online version of the article you are citing, there should not be any external links. Author information should be added to references when available. There's no need for a separate Awards section if it's going to consist of two short sentences. Incorporate into Reception. The Critical reception section overlaps too much with the review box. There's no need to have "PC Gamer US: 85%[1] in the box and then repeat "PC Gamer magazine gave an 85% in the US edition[1]" in the text. Try to make the text focus a little less on the score. The article could use some copy editing. I don't have time at the moment to do so myself, but a see quite a few sentences that are too wordy. For example, instead of "...Gordon experiencing some kind of vision that lets him review the explosion of the Citadel's Dark Fusion Reactor." you can say "...Gordon experiencing a vision of the Citadel's Dark Fusion Reactor exploding." (Is that supposed to be capitalized?) Pagrashtak 16:25, 25 May 2007 (UTC)
- Thank you for your comments; I will get to making the appropriate changes soon. Qjuad 18:27, 25 May 2007 (UTC)
- It's not bad. However: the Plot section is too long, trim some details. This section also needs copy editing. The Article requires more comparison with Half-Life 2: What is different? What is new? What has been changed/lost? This could be incorporated into a "Gameplay" section, something that all CVG FA's and GA's have (I think). Otherwise, it ain't bad. Goldfritter 18:26, 29 May 2007 (UTC)
PS: would be glad to help, when this review is done... I love me some gewd PC Games!- Thank you for your comments and offer of help; I will get to making appropriate changes soon. Qjuad 05:12, 30 May 2007 (UTC)