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Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/Peer review/Pakistan Air Force Academy

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I do like to promote this article from the current B ranking, so want a review to make further improvements. --SMS Talk 13:38, 8 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Carom

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A few comments:

  • The lead should be expanded. It should really provide both an overview of, and an introduction to, the rest of the article.
  • The section "Qaid's address" seems superfluous. Overly long block quotes like this are usually unnecessary, and in this case, it doesn't really seem to add anything.
Should it be shortened or completely removed? SMS Talk 09:44, 22 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
I would remove it entirely. Carom (talk) 19:19, 22 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
 Done SMS Talk 20:04, 22 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • There are a number of very short sections. These should be expanded, not only to give the reader a more complete understanding of the topic, but also to enhance the visual appeal of the article.
  • The "see also" section is unwarranted, and should be removed.
 Done SMS Talk 03:43, 10 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • The entire article really needs copyediting. We now have a dedicated request center for copyedits; you can ask one of the editors listed there to help you with this.

Hopefully these are helpful for you to be going on with at the moment. Carom (talk) 00:53, 9 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Buckshot06

[edit]

Good article on a neglected topic. Quick note - the 'Story of Pakistan Air Force' and 'History of Pakistan Air Force' need publisher and date information. Could you also explain the use of 'Royal Pakistan Air Force'? Is that correct? Agree with all Carom's comments as well. Buckshot06 (talk) 22:03, 9 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I will surely add the publisher information. And about 'Royal Pakistan Air Force', which was the name of the force when it was established 60 years ago and that is only used in the quote of the Quaid-e-Azam, as I think i can't change the quote.--SMS Talk 03:34, 10 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
No, no worries. I looked up the main article and I understand why it was used. Cheers Buckshot06 (talk) 03:55, 10 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]