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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

Article promoted by TomStar81 (talk) via MilHistBot (talk) 07:06, 9 November 2015 (UTC) « Return to A-Class review list[reply]

Yugoslav submarine Hrabri

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Nominator(s): Peacemaker67 (crack... thump)

Yugoslav submarine Hrabri (edit | talk | history | links | watch | logs)

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Hrabri (Brave) was built using parts from a cancelled WWI British L-class submarine, and saw peacetime service in the Royal Yugoslav Navy from 1928. By the time she was captured by the Italians during the April 1941 Axis invasion of Yugoslavia, she was obsolescent, so she was scrapped. Her sister Nebojša passed ACR in late September, and points raised during her review have already been addressed for this article. Peacemaker67 (crack... thump) 07:54, 30 September 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Support Comments: G'day, I made a couple of c/e tweaks: please check that you are happy with those and adjust if desired. In addition, I have the following suggestions: AustralianRupert (talk) 21:10, 2 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

  • are there ISSNs that could be added for the periodicals in the References list? These can usually be found on [www.worldcat.org]
  • accessdates for the websites?
  • should the translation of the ship's name (Brave) be included in the body of the article somewhere?
  • inconsistent: "Their radius of action was 5,000 miles (8,000 km)..." (in the body of the article) v. "Range: 5,000 nautical miles (9,300 km)" (in the infobox)
  • "The ships and crews made a very good impression while visiting Malta" --> I think this should possibly be attributed in the text as it seems like an opinion. For instance, "According to the British naval attache, the ships and crews made a very good impression while visiting Malta..." or maybe "Jarman recounts that the British naval attache was very impressed by the ships and their crews while visiting Malta" (or something similar). Thoughts?
  • Support
    • No dabs, external links check out, no duplicate links, no issues with ref consolidation, image has alt text, no MOS issues I could see.
    • Image is PD and seems to have the appropriate information.
    • Caption looks fine.
    • This seems a little repetitive: "British L-class submarine of World War I, and she was built using parts originally assembled for an L-class submarine that was never completed." (Specifically "L-Class submarine" twice in the same sentence). Consider something like "British L-class submarine of World War I, and she was built using parts originally assembled for a submarine of that class which was never completed." (minor prose nitpick, suggestion only).
    • "...and one machine gun..." do we know what calibre? If so it should be added here and to the infobox (I assume it is not detailed in the sources though hence why you haven't included it, I just wanted to check just in case).
    • "Along with her sister ship..." - is it correct to use "ship" here or should this be "sister submarine"?
    • "Along with her sister submarine Nebojša...", this is a little redundant as you have already mentioned Nebojsa was its sister above (another minor nitpick).
    • Otherwise this looks good to me. The article is a little short but given the nature of the vessel's service its length seems appropriate.

Anotherclown (talk) 05:39, 10 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Support on prose per standard disclaimer. These are my edits. - Dank (push to talk) 20:55, 8 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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