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January 29

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14:07:50, 29 January 2018 review of submission by Emailgb123

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Unclear to me why declined. Users on the help desk suggest it's a problem of notability, but the message from the editor suggests it's a citation problem. Emailgb123 (talk) 14:07, 29 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

@Emailgb123: Per the conflict of interest guideline WP:PAY, you should disclose your paid advocacy in any discussion you participate in regarding the topic you are paid to edit.
The reviewer said the draft does not meet Wikipedia's minimum standard for inline citations, so let's assume that it was declined because of a citation problem. There may be more problems. The subject may not be notable. But one problem at a time.
Consider the paragraph: "Jin was born on October 15, 1988, in Beijing, China. His father, who is from Shanghai, is Dan Yang Jin, a controller of Chinese government-owned corporations. His mother is Xiang Hong Zhao, a doctor of traditional Chinese medicine from Hunan. He moved to Hamburg, Germany at the age of six to join his mother, who moved to Germany following Konrad Adenauer’s invitation to bring traditional Chinese medicine to Germany." There's an inline citation at the end, implying that all this information came from [1]. But the only portion it supports is that he joined his mother in Germany when he was six years old. There's also the problem that BusinessCollective is advertorial ("Our in-house editorial team guides members through a professional editing process to help them craft expert business content for our trusted media network.") It's the sort of source that, if an (unpaid) editor trod in it accidentally, they would quickly try to scrape off their shoe in disgust.
The next section, two paragraphs with an inline citation at the end, has similar citation problems. The cited source supports only one phrase in the first paragraph and much of the second paragraph (but not that he received a master's degree or later a green card). Examine the remaining three paragraphs for further disconnects between the text and the sources.
Reviewers are not likely to look kindly on a list of patents or a long list of non-notable "awards". If I were you I would remove those sections. --Worldbruce (talk) 16:32, 29 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Worldbruce Much appreciated. I had disclosed elsewhere and did not realize I should also disclose again in discussion. I am being paid to create and edit this on behalf of a marketing firm hired by the subject. I hope that's sufficient disclosure, if not please advise.

I understand about the citation issues and had warned the client of this potential roadblock. I will prune this mightily and resubmit soon. Thanks for the clarification!

22:18:37, 29 January 2018 review of submission by Soniabusan

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Mr. Shammi Rana is a Genuine hardworking official of Asian Belt Wrestling Federation and Unesco Traditional Sports and Games and supporting many Traditional Organization to be part of Unesco TSG and we want his page that helps other Traditional Sports and Games organizations to Join Unesco TSG. Soniabusan (talk) 22:18, 29 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

The page has since been deleted due to a copyright violation. Curb Safe Charmer (talk) 22:35, 29 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Mr Rana may well be genuine and hardworking, but it is a requirement of Wikipedia that such people have articles only if they have been written about in independent WP:Reliable sources. Wikipedia is not at all interested in what an organisation wants for its employees, but if the subject has been written about, then it is up to the editor to show this by using in-line citations to the sources. See WP:Referencing for beginners for guidance on how to do this. It is important that you summarise what the sources say about the subject, and don't copy text. Dbfirs 22:43, 29 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
User:Soniabusan - You have created a new draft page, but it doesn't appear to be about Shammi Rama, but about his work. Robert McClenon (talk) 02:35, 30 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
... also, the new draft on "TSG" seems to be a copyright violation, being taken directly from the single source. Dbfirs 08:21, 30 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]