Wikipedia:Peer review/Zombies in the Snow/archive1

Zombies in the Snow

I would like to make this article a Featured Article Candidate, but first I would like some input on anything I should do to make it better. — The Man in Question 23:53, 14 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]

The lead currently doesn't really explain if the movie really exists or if it is fictional. That's something the first sentence should make absolutely clear. Also, I don't see any reason for that Boy #1 and Boy #2 thing. Why not just call them "the boys"? They're mentioned together throughout the article anyway. Furthermore, the captions should not be in <small> tags and there seem to be too many unnecessary fair use images in the article. --Fritz Saalfeld (Talk) 17:13, 15 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks. I added the fact that the film is definitely a work of fiction in the second sentence, because I couldn't find any way to fit it into the first without breaking the flow. Also, I changed Boy #1 and Boy #2 to "the boys", like you suggested. About the fair-use issue: I changed the main picture to what I felt was a more appropriate heading anyway ({{art}}). The obvious problem, of course, is that no other pictures exist to illustrate the article (except one which I didn't include and would fall under fair use anyway). If an acceptable solution presents itself, I'll be happy to accept.

Meanwhile, I would very much appreciate more input on the article, since I do want to try to get it up to featured article status. — The Man in Question 19:42, 15 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]

How about "Zombies in the Snow, is a fictional movie in the children's novel series A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snicket (a.k.a. Daniel Handler)." and then give the information about the fictional director in a second sentence? My concern with the images was not so much the license: Even if these weren't fair use images, I'd still think there are too many. You could easily drop at least two, as most aren't really essential to illustrate the article. --Fritz Saalfeld (Talk) 16:07, 16 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]

All right. I've re-written the first sentence (not quite the way you said, but closer at least). Also, I removed the picture of the fishing cannery. Should the picture of "Dolores" go? I think it helps the reader understand the whimsical nature of the story better (along with the forest scene picture). However, I suppose it could go. The other pictures, however, I think should stay. — The Man in Question 03:33, 18 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]

A couple things on a quick scan:

"Dolores has at least two songs in the film, but otherwise seems to serve little purpose." and "...The Reptile Room, is modeled after the classic science fiction/horror genre so common in 1950's filming (Creature From the Black Lagoon, 1954, Man From Planet X, 1951, Brain From Planet Arous, 1957, etc.), but with a singularly unusual twist at the end." Both are original research-ish and need references to back them up
See if you can find more references than the two (both by the author) that you have.

The Catfish 02:38, 16 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks. Unfortunately, there really are no other resources. Not trying to harp on anything, but more comments are always welcome. — The Man in Question 04:23, 16 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]