Wikipedia:Peer review/The Broadway League/archive1
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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review to better understand what readers would want from this article.
While I intend to further expand the Audience Development Programs section and Services section, I am interested in knowing what aspects peer editors think this article needs further improvement.
I'm particularly interested in neutrality of the article, as well as whether the sections appear disconnected.
Any comments/suggestions would be appreciated.
Thanks, Decafespresso (talk) 20:41, 1 April 2015 (UTC)
- Comments from Ugog Nizdast
- The section arrangements look fine but see Manual of Style#Headings and the part which says to write it in sentence case not title case. Also I think there are too many stubby sections or subsections. Don't put a heading if the text is barely a single para.
- The lead section could be expanded according to WP:LEADLENGTH. The intro statement doesn't say the country or which part of it (New York, US), think of the global readership.
- Regarding the neutrality, I don't see any apparent problems. It looks fine to me.
If you like to know more, tell me. Good day, Joel. Ugog Nizdast (talk) 10:50, 20 April 2015 (UTC)
Comments by MJ94
[edit]- Lede
- Personally, I think the lede is a good length as it quickly summarizes what the article will be about.
- However, I feel like the lede seems to be a bit promotional, especially with phrases such as "the League recognizes excellent works". Are they truly excellent or are they excellent according to The League?
- Membership
- All looks well here. You manage to get a lot of information in a section that is not too overwhelming.
- History
- I would move the first citation to the end of the sentence.
- Very well-sourced and researched. Great job.
- Labor negotiations
- This section seems a bit short. Are you able to combine it with another section?
- Additional citations would be useful as well.
- Award programs
- "The Antoinette Perry Awards for Excellence in Theatre, more commonly known as the Tony Awards, recognize achievement in live American theatre and are presented by the Tony Award Productions, a joint venture of American Theatre Wing and the League, at an annual ceremony in New York City." This seems a bit wordy and could also use a citation.
- Current programs
- "The League produces various concert programs such as Broadway on Broadway and Stars in the Alley to promote productions currently running on Broadway." I think it'd be useful to start the section with "The Broadway League", rather than "The League".
Honestly, I'm very impressed with the content, sources, and how well laid out all the information is. I believe this article definitely has potential and the amount of references it has is superb. MJ94 (talk) 22:39, 28 April 2015 (UTC)