Wikipedia:Peer review/Religious and spiritual use of cannabis/archive1
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- A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style; it can be found on the automated peer review page for April 2009.
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because…
I am seeking feedback on making this article meet FAC standards.
Thanks, —Whig (talk) 03:41, 9 April 2009 (UTC)
Notes from Casliber
[edit]- ...carry on a centuries, if not older tradition of the sacramental use of cannabis. - vague and nongrammatical - have we an estimate of how old the practice is?
- Regarding the Tuscarora tribal tradition, this fact claim lacks citation and has been flagged accordingly. —Whig (talk) 15:07, 9 April 2009 (UTC)
- This claim has been removed as unverifiable and likely false. —Whig (talk) 06:03, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
- Regarding the Tuscarora tribal tradition, this fact claim lacks citation and has been flagged accordingly. —Whig (talk) 15:07, 9 April 2009 (UTC)
- In ancient Germanic culture, cannabis was associated with the Norse love goddess, Freya. - I think you'd want a more reliable source than that one, that's a big claim...Casliber (talk · contribs) 02:13, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
- Added another reference. —Whig (talk) 06:02, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
Redtigerxyz's comments
[edit]Frankly, the article is assessed against WP:GAC rather than WP:FAC as the article is much closer to the former than the latter.
- More detail is needed to eliminate 1 line paras. for eg. Indian Hemp Drugs Commission Report has so much detail about Hindu use of cannabis plant, which is not included. Though detail is needed, at the same time, too much detail can be WP:UNDUE.
- The Indian Hemp Drugs Commission Report quotes are copy-paste: they should be written in text form by the editors in their own language. The quotes are not quote worthy
- "Charas, is smoked by some Shaivite devotees..." Explain in brief what is charas
- Use "Cannabis" through out for consistency, replace synonyms like marijuana with cannabis, or write a brief description of how marijuana is related to cannabis.
- Tags added.
- References:
- Stick to one citation style "this divine force (Rätsch 2003). " OR <ref></ref>
- Follow a consistent reference sequence as done in "Further reading". Maybe you may want to use {{citeweb}}, {{citebook}}. Format "The Guardian, Monday 6 January 2003 10.19 GMT" ref too per ref style. See WP:REF for ref styles.
- Never use Ibid. as another editor may add a ref in between.
- I am not sure about reliability and neutrality of http://www.skunked.co.uk/articles/history-intoxicant.htm
- Have not checked all references for reliability as lots needs to done even before a WP:GAN.
--Redtigerxyz Talk 15:04, 9 April 2009 (UTC)
- These are helpful suggestions. In regards the excerpted quotes from the Indian Hemp Drugs Commission Report which use a number of Sanskrit terms and references in some cases, it might be problematic for editors to offer a translation without being WP:OR. —Whig (talk) 15:14, 9 April 2009 (UTC)
- The essence of the extract is needed, not every unnecessary detail. Done quote --> text for Hindu use. Do the same for Sikh use. --Redtigerxyz Talk 14:08, 13 April 2009 (UTC)
Phil_burnstein
[edit]I'm on vacation until Friday, but I still want to leave some notes.
- The lead paragraph isn't supposed to contain information that isn't in the article.
- I think that various spiritual groups use cannabis in different ways for different results, but I may be wrong.
- The way the article reads now, a better title would be "Use of Cannabis by Various Sects".
- By confining yourself to cannabis, you lose all the other cultures that use hallucinogens. eg Amerindians.
- I apologise for not giving this enough time. Phil_burnstein (talk) 12:37, 13 April 2009 (UTC)
- Thanks, Phil. While this article is about spiritual use of cannabis there should certainly be a Wikipedia article on spiritual use of other plants, or of psychoactive plants (or fungi, etc.) generally, which this article could be linked to. —Whig (talk) 03:25, 19 April 2009 (UTC)
llywrch comments:
[edit]This is a fascinating -- & obviously controversial -- topic. My thoughts as I read this article:
- You may want to find ways to tie in the history of cultivation of Cannabis with its spiritual use. For example, had I known Germany grows a lot of hemp, the claim that the ancient Germans smoked Cannabis would have passed the smell test for me.
- Likewise, you should try to expand on how Cannabis is used spiritually. For example, there's Mircea Eliade's thesis that shamans seek to commune with God through mystical ecstasy, & Cannabis would be one of several tools used to achieve this. Adding this information will help to combat the misperception that "spiritual use of cannabis" is another way of saying "here's a list of rationalizations dirty hippies use to justify abusing drugs."
- A minor point: in this article both BC/AD & BCE/CE styles appear. You need to standardize on one -- either would be satisfactory.
- A bit of trivia: Cannabis use is illegal in Ethiopia. (If needed, I can look for a source for this.) Its use is mostly confined to foreigners, since the preferred non-alcoholic recreational drug is khat -- which is reported to cause the usual problems reported for drug abuse.
- One problematic omission here -- which would keep this article from reaching FA status (if the people there look at more than how well it conforms to the MoS) -- is the lack of information on its spiritual use between ancient & modern times. (The sections on undated Muslim & Sikh use is all that covers those centuries.) If there is no continuity in Europe between ancient & modern uses, then where did the idea of this spiritual use come from? Are there no references to its use in India between the Rig Vedas & modern times?
Hope these suggestions help you. -- llywrch (talk) 17:01, 16 April 2009 (UTC)
- Thanks for the suggestions. I'm not sure the legal status of cannabis in particular countries is relevant to the subject of this article, except and where there may be some sort of legal recognition or protection of religious use. I agree that dates should be standardized and changed references from BC to BCE to respect non-Christian traditions which make up a lot of the subject matter of this article. —Whig (talk) 03:23, 19 April 2009 (UTC)
- I only mentioned its legal status in Ethiopia due to the Rastafarian connection -- & for entertainment sake. If it doesn't fit, no need to add it. :) -- llywrch (talk) 16:14, 21 April 2009 (UTC)