Wikipedia:Peer review/Pleiades (star cluster)/archive1

Pleiades

I've worked on this article on and off since I found it with a cleanup tag on many months ago. Just looking for opinions on what more is needed to get it ready for an eventual FAC nomination. Worldtraveller 17:52, 30 September 2005 (UTC)[reply]

OK - here we go World! (I'm not reviewing for content, just structure)

Grammer of caption in opening image needs a bit of work
"History" - one paragraph is too short
"Composition" - second paragraph is too short
"Age and future evolution" - third paragraph is too short (hmmm...!)
"Reflection nebulosity" - all paragraphs too short
"Names and technical information" - all paragraphs too short. One sentence paragraph. "Type" needs a legend. "Pronounciation guide" is funky and should probably be a legend too.
"The Pleiades in folklore" - no need for a list here. One sentence paragraphs. Paragraphs too short.
"References" - footnotes should be kept in a seperate section!
"External links" - could use better descriptions

Thank care! Ryan Norton ^{T | @ | C} 18:45, 30 September 2005 (UTC)[reply]

What's wrong with the grammar of the opening caption? Paragraphing is definitely a problem, but it's on track for FA nomination. Tony 05:18, 1 October 2005 (UTC)[reply]

Well, it may need a bit of work. It just doesn't sit right with me for some reason.

I.E. "The Pleiades, dominated by hot blue stars surrounded by reflection nebulosity"
The Pleiades, dominated by hot blue stars and surrounded by reflection nebulosity

The Pleiades, dominated by hot blue stars that are surrounded by reflection nebulosity

I don't know, that seems closer to me. I could be wrong, though. Ryan Norton ^{T | @ | C} 05:25, 1 October 2005 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for the comments! I have adjusted the first image caption, expanded a few paras and rearranged a few bits. Mythology bit is prose instead of list now. As for references/footnotes, they're now all references with appropriate citation points in the text. Have tried to give links better descriptions.

Not quite sure what you mean by 'should be a legend' for the pronunciation guide, but in any case they really need to be given in IPA format, but I don't know how to do that. Anyone else? Worldtraveller 15:27, 5 October 2005 (UTC)[reply]

It's a very good article but a little crowded somehow. I enjoyed the inclusion of all the images but somehow it seems a bit to move through at times. Including the aspects of world folklore about the Pleiades is a wonderful touch though. Overall, I really like this article.--Mike 01:33, 16 October 2005 (UTC)[reply]