Wikipedia:Peer review/OneShot/archive1
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This peer review discussion is closed. |
Since OneShot's creation as a C-class article, I have made extensive improvements to it. I'd now like to learn what goes into creating a higher-quality article so I can contribute to the encyclopedia in a more effective manner.
Thanks, - Novov T C 00:15, 6 February 2021 (UTC)
Comments from Gerald Waldo Luis
[edit]- The images would require alt texts, to assist readers using screen readers. If you can't compose one, let me know and I'll try do it. GeraldWL 06:30, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
- In the lead, it says "the game has been described by the developers as having "the world [know] you exist"." This doesn't seem to be cited in the article. GeraldWL 06:30, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
- In the gameplay, it says "find content outside the game, including in the filesystem." Is it "filesystem" or "file system" with a space? GeraldWL 06:30, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
- In the plot, "city" at "Arriving at the city library" seems redundant. GeraldWL 06:30, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
- "be accessed using three phosphoric items." Should Phosphorus be linked within "phosphoric"? GeraldWL 06:30, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
- Metacritic uses 8 critics; this should be noted within the prose. GeraldWL 06:30, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
- The overall article is decent, though more content from reliable sources would expand the coverage further. GeraldWL 06:30, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
- Sources for the game are rather hard to come by; I only just decided that the article was notable enough when creating it. You've definitely right though, I could add a few more reviews, the extant reviews have a bit more info that could be added to the article, and I could also look for sources beyond my usual hunting grounds. - Novov T C 08:45, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
- In addition, if you can expand the reception section, I suggest reading WP:RECEPTION to make the prose more engaging. GeraldWL 09:02, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
- I've expanded the development and reception sections and made the latter better worded; not sure if I'm quite done yet though. - Novov T C 09:50, 19 February 2021 (UTC)
- I'm fine with all references, but reference 19 and 20 are forums from (seemingly) fans, which is not reliable. Please replace with a reliable source. WP:VGRS and WP:RSP is a guide to filtering sources. GeraldWL 06:30, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
- They've not from fans, but from the blogs of the game's creators. Another editor chose to add them, but I didn't remove them as the posts highlight important information that isn't found elsewhere - that Niko's gender is supposed to be ambiguous, and the different interpretations by reviewers aren't just some odd inconsistency. - Novov T C 08:45, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
- That sounds fine, though if an RS is available it's better to use that. The word Tumblr is a red flag to many. GeraldWL 09:02, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
- I totally get your concerns, but unfortunately I couldn't find a more reliable source. - Novov T C 09:51, 19 February 2021 (UTC)
Thanks for the review. I've made most of the changes you described, and have commented below the respective point with rationale for the ones I've ignored. - Novov T C 08:45, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
- Much likewise. The last thing I'd comment on is that the cover art non-free rationale has some "n.a"s which can be filled, suggest filling it in case you wanna bring it to GA and an editor is bored enough to look at it. Meanwhile, if you can comment on my peer review, it'd be appreciated. GeraldWL 11:05, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
- The "n.a."s are there as those sections aren't necessary for that image. - Novov T C 10:24, 19 February 2021 (UTC)
- It's vital though. Just copy the ones from File:Microsoft Flight Simulator 2020 cover art.png, it's the same thing. GeraldWL 11:25, 19 February 2021 (UTC)
- Although the File Upload Wizard said I didn't need to add them, I've done it anyway as there's no harm in doing so. And IIRC, you've not supposed to copy them, as they should be unique for each image. - Novov T C 02:51, 20 February 2021 (UTC)
- It's vital though. Just copy the ones from File:Microsoft Flight Simulator 2020 cover art.png, it's the same thing. GeraldWL 11:25, 19 February 2021 (UTC)
- The "n.a."s are there as those sections aren't necessary for that image. - Novov T C 10:24, 19 February 2021 (UTC)