Wikipedia:Peer review/Lana Del Rey discography/archive1

Lana Del Rey discography

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I would like to nominate it for featured list status in the future and would like to know what I could do to make the article better.

Thanks in advance, Littlecarmen (talk) 15:52, 20 June 2014 (UTC)

Comments from Ojorojo

In looking over the lead, one of the first things that catches the readers' attention is the extensive use of inline citations. One sentence has 10 refs and 7 sentences have 3 or more. The inclusion of so much detail seems to run contrary of the goal of a lead, that is to "serve as an introduction to the article and a summary of its most important aspects" (Wikipedia:Manual of Style/Lead section, emphasis added). As is pointed out in Wikipedia:Manual of Style/Stand-alone lists, "A well-written lead section is of particular importance to stand-alone lists that feature little or no prose in their article body". The lead should be an overview of the article and touch on the highlights. Thus, it would be better to include statements like "It is Del Rey's best-charting single to date, peaking at number one in three countries and being certified Platinum or better in four" rather than detailing the specific countries and awards. Likewise, "Born to Die reached number one in nine countries and received Platinum awards in fifteen" rather than listing the countries. This could be handled with a single reference to an artist bio or similar article without having to cite multiple refs for each country and award. The reader can refer to the body of the discography for the specifics. It may be beneficial to review FL discographies of similar artists for ideas about the lead. —Ojorojo (talk) 14:08, 25 June 2014 (UTC)

Thank you for the feedback! I have improved the lead a bit. Littlecarmen (talk) 21:21, 25 June 2014 (UTC)