Wikipedia:Peer review/Interstellar (film)/archive1
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This is a quality article that has essentially been abandoned. I want to help it finally get to Good Article status. Cognissonance (talk) 19:26, 25 January 2018 (UTC)
- Comments from Freikorp
- The first lead paragraph looks a little too short, the second looks a little too long. I'd try and balance it out a bit
"and wrote a tie-in book (The Science of Interstellar)" - I'd just present this as prose instead of putting it in bracketsThe second lead paragraph has too many instance of "the film"; I'd replace at least one of them with an alternative, such as the film's nameI'd merge the two sentence paragraph in the plot with the above paragraphWikilink cryostasis to Cryonics- The cast section is a bit of a mess. In good/featured articles that have cast sections, I've only ever seen either bullet point lists or detailed lists. This seems to be some kind of awkward hybrid. Persons toward the bottom of the lists are only given basic descriptions, and descriptions themselves seem to be selective. Why are we given a direct quote from Ms Hanley but not any of the other people toward the bottom of the list?
- Agreed. Will find a solution for this. Cognissonance (talk) 16:15, 28 January 2018 (UTC)
- I've never seen a bullet point crew list before
- I'll consider removing this. Cognissonance (talk) 16:15, 28 January 2018 (UTC)
"Entertainment Weekly has commented" - I'd drop the word 'has'- "had worked on other science fiction scripts" - can you give an example?
- I think the sentence refers to scripts Nolan could have chosen apart from Interstellar. Cognissonance (talk) 16:15, 28 January 2018 (UTC)
"requesting permission to use some of their featured interviews in Interstellar" - was permission granted?Are the co-ordinates for the corn field really necessary? I think it's an eyesore"A two-week Iceland shoot was scheduled" - is scheduled the right word here? I mean, after it was scheduled it was actually done, saying it was scheduled implies that it may not have been completed, only booked"the Ranger, the Endurance, and the Lander" - why is only "Endurance" in italics?- "but his image was digitally removed from the film and his voicing for CASE was replaced" - this is interesting, can you find any indication as to why this was done?
- I can't find a source that explains this. Cognissonance (talk) 16:15, 28 January 2018 (UTC)
- "The human space habitats ... " - try and avoid one-sentence paragraphs if you can
"tasked with sound mixing" - I'd change this to audio mixing; that's what 'sound mixing' redirects to and you've got three uses of the word 'sound' in one sentence which reads awkwardly"the big drums are probably in the bin."[1]", "the plot of the movie".[2]", "on November 18, 2014.[5]" - what on Earth is going on with the reference formatting here???- "Both films end with parents and children being reunited with seemingly impossible age differences." - unsourced
- Found none, removed it. Cognissonance (talk) 16:15, 28 January 2018 (UTC)
- I'd reword the quote from Lawrence Krauss into prose. I'd also merge some of the four paragraphs containing the opinions of physicists into two paragraphs at most, possible even one
- The source is dead so I removed it. Cognissonance (talk) 16:15, 28 January 2018 (UTC)
"so the finished black hole ignored the Doppler effect" - I'd replace the term "Doppler effect" here with "it", as we've used "Doppler effect" three times in two sentences"Correct depiction of the Penrose process was also praised" - again, avoid single sentence paragraphsWhere is the "Lockheed Martin IMAX Theater" located?Replace the word "movie" with "film" unless it's a direct quote"the official movie novelization, written by Greg Keyes, was released by Penguin Random House" - unsourced, cite the book itself if you have to- "The film played 52% male and 75% over 25 years old" - sentence fragment
- Source is unintelligible, so I can't find out what is meant by "played". Removed. Cognissonance (talk) 16:15, 28 January 2018 (UTC)
As a final note, you've got at least one bare URL reference and some references need to be modified to address MOS:ALLCAPS
- I'll keep my eye on that. Cognissonance (talk) 16:15, 28 January 2018 (UTC)
Hope these comments help. Good luck. Freikorp (talk) 04:25, 28 January 2018 (UTC)
- Thanks for the help! Cognissonance (talk) 16:15, 28 January 2018 (UTC)