Wikipedia:Peer review/If This Is Love/archive1

If This Is Love

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I plan on nominating it for good article status but want to make sure it is completely up to standard before doing so. Thanks, Jazminerocks 07:30, 30 May 2010 (UTC)

• {{doing}} Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs^(talk) 21:07, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

Comments by David Fuchs

• "The track samples Yazoo's 1982 single "Situation" (written by Vince Clarke and Alison Moyet) as its heavily-synthesised backing rhythm, the difference between the rhythm of "If This Is Love" is that it is in A♭-tune, in comparison to the original's C♭-tune." - comma splice
• "A♯m–E♯m-F" mixing some (en/em)dashes here and elsewhere. WP:DASH is your friend.
• "Una Healy elaborates:" Una Healy is only guessing as to what the song means, so it should be phrased as such.
• "It garnered comparisons with the music produced by the likes of Girls Aloud, Depeche Mode, Sugababes, Robyn and Rachel Stevens, and was praised for its Yazoo sample and catchy chorus." Source?
• I think the reception section could use some more summarization, instead of just rattling off sound bites from critics. Why is a whole paragraph from the BBC review quoted wholesale?
• The "concept" section really could be slimmed down (and sourced if possible).
• Paragraphs need at least three sentences. Any groupings with less need to be cut, merged, or expanded.

--Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs^(talk) 15:12, 8 June 2010 (UTC)