Wikipedia:Peer review/Gliding/archive1

Gliding

Comments please. I would like to get this up to Featured Article standard so some fresh thinking would be appreciated especially from both experts on the subject and others. JMcC 16:32, 29 August 2006 (UTC) PS I am also puzzled by its indentation in the list above.

• The article is fairly comprehensive but needs more references - large sections are completely uncited. Coupled with the widespread use of weasel words (there are lots of uses of commonly, sometimes, very, mainly etc.), this detracts from what could be an interesting article. It also appears somewhat US-centric in places (notable glider pilots in particular). There is some jargon that either needs explaining or replacing with common terms ("closed-circuit tasks" "out of station" etc.). More specific comments:
  • "Gliding is a widespread, but little publicised, activity in most developed countries despite several famous participants. " - this sentence implies that the activity is widespread despite several famous participants, so needs rephrasing. The lack of publicity is never mentioned again, so should either be dropped or expanded upon later in the article.
  • The section on bird flight in the lead is not required - the disambiguation link at the top of the article already covers this.
  • Having the recreation vs sport section before the history seems a little strange, and since half of this section covers social aspects (which presumably apply to both) the section title may need changing.
  • "There are also glider aerobatics competitions." - this could do with expansion.
  • The history section would benefit from expansion - it skips from the 1930s to the present day.
  • What happened to gliding at the Olympics?
  • "...thermals, depending on the climate and terrain, can exceed 3,000 m..." - needs to make clear whether this is the height gliders can reach in thermals or whether it is the height thermals reach.
  • The term "thermalling" is dropped in without explanation
  • "...crests of atmospheric waves..." - are these the same as mountain waves?
  • Morning Glory would benefit from at least a brief explanation here.
  • ",notably to the albatrosses..." - creeping toward explaining bird gliding
  • "However, to prevent damage to the glider while landing, the pilot should dump the water before landing." - says who?
  • "The FAI also issues diplomas for 1000 km" - is that in a single flight?
  • "Sometimes a pilot on a cross-country flight finds that the weather is not as good as expected" - this needs rephrasing.

Hope this helps Yomangani^talk 00:34, 1 September 2006 (UTC)

• I've had another quick look over it:
  • Refs should follow punctuation per the manual of style (you have some before and some after).
  • It could still do with some more citations (the types of lift subsections in the "Soaring" section and the "Learning to glide" section in particular).
  • History still moves rather abruptly from the 50s to the present day, but you've filled in the war and post war section nicely.
  • If you are having trouble finding non-US notables, you might consider trimming some of the US entries - the ex-news anchorman and the (although it pains me to say it about people who have performed repairs on delicate equipement in space) minor astronauts. Alternatively you could make a category, link to it and just refer to a couple of the most famous here. (I remember there was quite an extended sequence featuring Steve McQueen in a glider in the original Thomas Crown Affair - you may be able to work in some "trivia" if you take this approach). If you keep it as list, this section might sit better after the Related sports section.

Good luck. Yomangani^talk 09:35, 5 September 2006 (UTC)

All the above comments have been reviewed and the suggested chnages have been made, JMcC 14:28, 26 September 2006 (UTC)