Wikipedia:Peer review/Friday the 13th (2009 film)/archive1

Friday the 13th (2009 film)

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I am looking to eventually take it to the FAC process. I recently had it copy edited by one of the members of the League of Copy Editors. I am looking for people to check over the structure of the page, look at neutrality, ask questions about confusing items (e.g., this is the 12th film in this series and thus I may indirectly identify peple by name and not by status because I know who they are automatically and it didn't occur to me that someone else will not, or similar issues), etc. If you see glaring grammar issues, or choppy wording please point those out as well.

Thanks,  BIGNOLE  (Contact me) 20:26, 27 March 2011 (UTC)

• This link seems to be dead. Also is the website considered a reliable source? GamerPro64 (talk) 21:38, 27 March 2011 (UTC)

• Well, to answer the last first, yes. Fangoria has been around since the late 70s covering horror related media. Unfortunately, I've noticed that their website often archives pages after only a couple of months. I'll see if I can find another version of it, otherwise.....I'll have to remove the info sadly. I found an archived version of the page and have replaced it.  BIGNOLE  (Contact me) 21:50, 27 March 2011 (UTC)

Comments by Nehrams2020

• The article goes between using and not using the serial comma. Check all occurrences and pick one to remain consistent.
• Should writing go before casting in the production section? That seems to be more sequential, especially since some of the cast members refer to the script.
• "The actor/stuntman wore a chest plate..." If referring to two people, probably should go with "Both the actor and stuntman wore...". If just Mears, settle on just one of the titles.
• Instead of the production image, consider uploading a video clip that better illustrates the visual effects being described.
• For all of the current mentions in the box office section, instead indicate "as of April 2011".
• Consider cropping the image of Aaron Yoo, it doesn't look that great with the autograph and pen in the corner.
• If possible, archive the links using WebCite to prevent linkrot.

Didn't spot too many issues, and this article's in very good shape. It would benefit from a few copyedits before FAC though. Nice work. --Happy editing! Nehrams2020 (talk • contrib) 05:12, 4 April 2011 (UTC)

It was copy edited by one of the League of Copy Editors not a month ago. :/ As for the serial commas, could you point to an example of where it is not being used? I just went through the article and checked and I couldn't find an instance where it wasn't being used. Maybe I'm overlooking it, but that's typically the style I use. I have seen people come to the article and remove them, but I usually put it back for consistency.

I have corrected the "actor/stuntman" issue. I left it just as "actor" as it was only referring to Mears. Which image are you referring to? The machete death, or Jason's torso? Both are just images that were found with the critical commentary on the work they illustrate. If you're referring to the machete, the only "video" would be the actual clip from the film (not sure how to get that since I cannot edit films on my computer) and I don't see how that will illustrate it any better since the scene in question happens to fast that you don't have time to register any computer generated imagery visually. Clips are also harder to justify than a single image.

I just removed all of the "currently" from the section. That was used in favor of saying "As of ...." because if you use the latter then you have to update the date regularly when the rankings won't change for at least a year. I just removed it entirely and we can update it once a year.

I'll check into cropping Yoo tomorrow after work Done. As for WebCite, I actually just got down with that earlier today. All webpages that can be archived through WebCite have been. I didn't include the archiveurl on the page, but I have put them in WebCite in case they do die.  BIGNOLE  (Contact me) 05:39, 4 April 2011 (UTC)