Wikipedia:Peer review/Charlie Brotman/archive1

Charlie Brotman

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because it is a new WP:BLP article.

Thanks,    → Michael J Ⓣ Ⓒ Ⓜ 19:50, 22 January 2013 (UTC)

Comments

• Could use a lead section rather than just one single section of text.
• Prefer the use of "References" to "Notes" when they're actually refs.
• Lead image has no caption which is a little odd.
• Check for ref placement (usually after punctuation).
• You could try to expand his background, birth, upbringing, family etc.
• It's a bit out of order, there's some modern stuff, then some older stuff, then some modern stuff again. Normally I see biographies as chronological accounts. A small summary of the bio in the lead, and then expanded chronological later on.

The Rambling Man (talk) 18:40, 29 January 2013 (UTC)