Wikipedia:Peer review/Arnold Friberg/archive1
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I'm basically looking for any suggestions on how the article could improve. Arnold Friberg is a well-known American artist. Thanks! ···日本穣? · Talk to Nihonjoe 00:08, 3 March 2007 (UTC)
This is a nice start. Here are my suggestions:
- Could you expand the biography section? For example, did anything else happen in Friberg's life besides the events connected to his artistic career? Could you try to round out the picture of the man a little?
- I would place the "Legacy" section after the biography section and describe his influence on other artists in prose and use the pictures as illustrations for your text.
- Might you include a section on Friberg's aesthetic? This might also include reviews of his work.
- The partial list of works should really include the dates of all of the works.
- Is it possible to find a fair or free-use image of Friberg and the Valley Forge painting to illustrate the page? They would enhance it greatly. Even images from the calendars or the Ten Commandments would be good.
- If you ever decide to submit this article for GA or FA, it will have to more citations. See WP:CITE.
- I would also restructure the lead to resemble a summary of the article so that a reader gets the gist of the article from the lead. WP:LEAD Awadewit 11:16, 3 March 2007 (UTC)
- Thanks for your comments. I've found it difficult to find biographical information beyond what I have so far in the articles already cited. I'm sure there's other information out there, but I haven't been able to find it so far. I haven't found many reviews, either. I don't even know what magazines to look in for that sort of thing, and I haven't found much online. I'd love to include dates for the works, but I haven't found anywhere that lists that information. As Friberg is still alive, I don't think a free copy of his Valley Forge painting would be available, and unless significant discussion of that particular work was taking place in the article, I don't think it would qualify as fair use (especially given how picky they've recently become here about that). Someone may be able to obtain a free image of Friberg, however.
- What else in this article requires more citations? I've never seen a specific number of citations as a requirement for GA or FA, just that the article have good and solid citations. If you could explain what you mean here a little more, that would be useful.
- I'm sorry, what I meant to say was a wider variety of sources. Most of your information comes from a single source. Have you tried a database like EBSCO (if you have access to it)?
- What else in this article requires more citations? I've never seen a specific number of citations as a requirement for GA or FA, just that the article have good and solid citations. If you could explain what you mean here a little more, that would be useful.
- I'm also unsure what you mean by restructuring the lead as it already gives a general overview of the content of the article. I suppose I (or someone else) could expand it more, but I don't want to make the intro too long. ···日本穣? · Talk to Nihonjoe 01:48, 4 March 2007 (UTC)
- I would just make sure that it is a summary and includes only the essentials of Friberg's life rather than details such as his Mormonism. That fact does not appear central to his biography. Awadewit 05:45, 4 March 2007 (UTC)
- I'm also unsure what you mean by restructuring the lead as it already gives a general overview of the content of the article. I suppose I (or someone else) could expand it more, but I don't want to make the intro too long. ···日本穣? · Talk to Nihonjoe 01:48, 4 March 2007 (UTC)
- The first thing that pops out at me is the lack of pronouns. The last three sentences of the intro and all the sentences in the second paragraph, for instance, all start with "Friberg." Surely a "he" is appropriate at places.
- The article could also use some images (e.g., a picture of the artist himself, and perhaps images that he has painted if they can be obtained under WP-compatible licenses).
- IMHO, the partial list of works is too long; I'd suggest putting a complete list in a separate article and listing only the most important ones in this article.
- The section on "Influence on other artists" seems like original research and, frankly, rather dubious speculation. This section should be expanded along with appropriate citations, or it should be deleted.
--Flex (talk|contribs) 19:25, 5 March 2007 (UTC)
- Thank you for your comments. I haven't had any luck finding any free images of the artist, and since he's still alive, there will not be any free examples of his artwork. They've gotten really strict lately about what qualifies as fair use, and any example artwork would likely be seen as simply decoration. I'll take the other comments under consideration and apply them as necessary. Thanks again for taking th time to review the article. ···日本穣? · Talk to Nihonjoe 22:06, 5 March 2007 (UTC)