Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Tulsa King/archive1

The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was archived by Gog the Mild via FACBot (talk) 4 May 2024 [1].

Tulsa King

Nominator(s): TheDoctorWho (talk) 06:51, 4 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Tulsa King is a streaming television series that is notable for being Sylvester Stallone's scripted television debut. The series is pretty well known for Stallone's performance. It has also set a few viewership records and has been the subject of a little controversy during second season production. In 2023 the series was nominated for a Creative Arts Emmy. Throughout the last few months I have put quite a bit of work into this article expanding it from a lower end C class all the way to GA. I believe it's now comprehensive enough to meet FA requirements. This will be my third FAC, and hopefully my second successful FA. I look forward to addressing any comments or concerns. TheDoctorWho (talk) 06:51, 4 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Oppose. Unfortunately at this point the article's prose needs significant improvement - I would suggest running it through GOCE and/or PR. Nikkimaria (talk) 14:51, 4 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]

750h

Oppose - sorry :). Prose needs a significant shape up. But I'll leave some comments nonetheless.

"Terence Winter served as the series showrunner for the first season but was demoted ahead of the second due to "creative differences"." WP:SERVEDAS: "Terence Winter served as the series" ==> "Terence Winter was the series". Also there should be a comma before "but" in WP:AmEng.
"Upon release, his boss sends him to Tulsa, Oklahoma, to establish criminal operations there." why is there a comma after "Oklahoma"? Unless that's just me being the Australian i am.

This one's actually correct, see WP:GEOCOMMA. Nikkimaria (talk) 15:23, 4 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]

"The following February, Winter was announced to have stepped down as showrunner due to "creative differences", with the search underway for a new showrunner, but would remain on the series as an executive producer." sentence could be more concise or split.

This isn't every comment i have, but some possible suggestions. Recommend taking this to WP:PR or WP:GOCE. This has the potential to be Featured, so I wish you luck. Best, 750 h+ 15:21, 4 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]

In the light of the comments above I am archiving this for off-FAC improvement. I would also recommend that the article be taken through GoCE and then PR prior to renomination. In any event, the usual two-week hiatus will apply. Gog the Mild (talk) 18:13, 4 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Closing note: This candidate has been archived, but there may be a delay in bot processing of the close. Please see WP:FAC/ar, and leave the {{featured article candidates}} template in place on the talk page until the bot goes through. Gog the Mild (talk) 18:13, 4 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Was on my way to ping a coordinator and ask to withdraw the nom based on the comments. I'll hopefully bring this back around in due time. TheDoctorWho (talk) 18:18, 4 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.