Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Shine (Gwen Stefani song)/archive2

The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was archived by Ian Rose via FACBot (talk) 03:49, 8 June 2016 [1].

Shine (Gwen Stefani song)

Nominator(s): Aoba47 (talk) 18:57, 5 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

This article is about...a song recorded by American singer Gwen Stefani and featuring vocals by Pharrell Williams for the 2014 film Paddington. I previously nominated this for FAC, but was informed the prose was not up to the standard of a featured article. The article has been copyedited and I believe it has all the qualities for a FA. Thank you in advance for your comments and suggestions. Aoba47 (talk) 18:57, 5 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Oppose - sorry. The prose is still not FA standard; there is overuse of "also" and "while" (both are often redundant) and the article lacks depth and detail. Why is "official" used so much? Are there unofficial examples of each usage? What key is the song in? (It sounds like E minor from the clip). What is the harmonic structure? Where was it recorded? What instruments were used? The article is worthy of a GA, but it's not ready for the Main Page. I suggest the article should be withdrawn from FAC; there is too much work still to be done. Graham Beards (talk) 19:46, 5 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Graham Beards: Thank you for your response. I have removed the repetitions of "also", "while", and "official". It is important to remember the song is unreleased, which means information on its composition and recording would not be made available so it is not possible to add some of the information you are requesting, but I will look for it. Aoba47 (talk) 20:05, 5 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Graham Beards: What would be the standard for FA proses? Carbrera (talk) 20:27, 5 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Wikipedia:Featured article criteria. Graham Beards (talk) 20:33, 5 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Graham Beards: I have added some information about the composition of the song (key, tempo, range instruments. etc.) I also somewhat restructured the page to include a separate section for the "Concept and development" and "Composition and lyrical interpretation" Aoba47 (talk) 20:47, 5 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

The article is not ready for promotion. I am not convinced all available sources have been mined and there are still problems with the prose; for example "The lyrics discuss". Lyrics cannot talk. Graham Beards (talk) 20:59, 5 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Graham Beards: I appreciate your comments. I have changed the part about the lyrics mentioned above. We will just have to agree to disagree as I honestly believe that I have mined all the available sources out there about this song. I do not believe there is a reliable source out there saying where the song was recorded (I have looked everywhere) A majority of the information on the recording locations is gathered from an album's liner notes and since the song was never released that would next to impossible to find. Aoba47 (talk) 21:16, 5 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Graham Beards: I was wondering if I could get your feedback on my recent expansion of the article. Thank you in advance. If you still oppose, then I will withdraw this from FAC and give up on attempting to get this article promoted further in the future. Aoba47 (talk) 01:02, 7 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Graham Beards: I would still appreciate your opinion of the article after its expansion even though I am withdrawing the nomination. Aoba47 (talk) 22:06, 7 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from AJona1992

You should add the genre of the film in the lead like most soundtrack song articles do.

Done

The article lacks any description on the character of the film (when first mentioned), odd if the song is basically a tune about him and the fact that he seems to be a "beloved classic" character. Who is he? What made him deserving of the title?

I am not sure how to add more information without it seeming distracting or out-of-place with the page's focus on the song. I included the quotes from Williams, Stefani, and the Weinstein Company about the song's connection to Paddington, but I am not sure about adding general information that is not directly tied to the song. Aoba47 (talk) 01:11, 6 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

You link basic instruments, but omitted vocal range?

Done

This is the first time we hear about No Doubt, you should have added that Stefani is the lead vocalist of that band or showed what connection the singer has to them.

Done

Why link Paddington Bear in the second subsection but not the first time he is mentioned?

Done

FN#6, FN#11, FN#13, FN#20, FN#24, FN#25, and FN#31 are not published publications and therefore should not be italicized.

Done

Overall the article has improved from your previous nomination, and I'll still support it once these issues have been resolved. Also, if you're not too busy, I currently have an article at FAC if you can leave a review that would be appreciated, but not required =) Best – jona ✉ 00:23, 6 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@AJona1992: I greatly appreciate your comments! I have tried my best to expand the article today with all the information I could find on this song. Let me know if there is anything else that needs to be addressed. Aoba47 (talk) 01:11, 6 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Sorry to hear that you've decided to withdraw your nomination, hopefully more information from this song can be found and don't give up hope. Best, – jona ✉ 12:58, 7 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@AJona1992: Thank you for your comment and your previous support on the last nomination. I agree with Graham Beards's comments (so I apologize to him if I came across as rude) and I will try my best to expand the article in the future. If I ever decide to pursue FAC for this article, I will make sure that all of the comments have been addressed. Good luck with your nomination as well! I do not feel comfortable leaving a review on your FAC as this nomination made me realize that I need to learn a lot more about the criteria for an FA; I hope you understand and I apologize for not being any help on that front. Aoba47 (talk) 19:49, 7 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Ian Rose: I would like to withdraw this nomination. I would like to thank both of the people who commented. While I still strongly believe I did the best I could with this page and mined all possible sources to create a comprehensive article on an unreleased song, it is highly unlikely this will ever be able to be improved to an FA. Aoba47 (talk) 02:52, 7 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Closing note: This candidate has been withdrawn, but there may be a delay in bot processing of the close. Please see WP:FAC/ar, and leave the {{featured article candidates}} template in place on the talk page until the bot goes through. Ian Rose (talk) 03:49, 8 June 2016 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.